


Unlikely Alliance

by rebelqueen



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Cheating, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Fraternities & Sororities, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, but that is subject to change..., other minor relationships - Freeform, rating mostly for language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-21
Updated: 2016-04-09
Packaged: 2018-05-22 07:45:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 34,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6071005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rebelqueen/pseuds/rebelqueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke starts her first year of college at her mom's Alma Mater, where she is accepted as a legacy into Zeta Beta Theta. The only thing driving her more insane than the copious amounts of glitter and smiling is the president of Omega Kappa Phi, Bellamy Blake.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Meet Cute

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so this is my first fic, so bear with me. Just a little heads up here, the story will start with Finn and Clarke being together, but I promise that will not last and the focus will be on Bellarke. Also, everything that I know about Sororities and Fraternities comes from the show Greek, so I apologize if I misrepresent anything, but it is just a story. I have quite a few chapters already written, but I will try and space them out in posting a little. I hope you guys enjoy, and I welcome any feedback that might help me grow as a writer. Thank you!

     Clarke played with the hem of her skirt as she stood on the front porch of the big white house. The sound of women laughing inside was hardly suppressed by the large wooden doors that stood before her. Every once in a while she could see a swoosh of long blonde hair pass one of the windows on the face of house, and Clarke seriously considered turning around and retreating back to the safety of her dorm room. I mean, what was the worst that could happen if she bailed? She could almost hear her mother’s lecture ringing in her ears at just the thought of leaving, and she cringed a little on the inside. This was where her mother had gone to college, and this was the sorority she had been in during "the best years of her life." It where she had met her best friends to this day, which was how she knew Clarke would love it too if she only gave it a chance. Clarke could do this. She took a deep breath, straightened her shoulders, and raised a fist to knock.

     A girl only slightly taller than Clarke with pale skin and curly black hair opened the door with a smile on her face. She introduced herself as Maya and quickly ushered Clarke in to join the gaggle of young girls gathered in the living room of the big house. A banner hung over the mantel that read "Welcome Sisters" in bright bubbly letters and an excess amount of glitter.

     "So what is your name?" Maya asked looking Clarke up and down critically. She seemed to approve of what she saw. Clarke had replaced her usual jeans and hoodie with a white summer dress covered in red roses that fell just above her knees and showed a little shoulder. Her mother had bought it specifically for this moment and had given it to her upon arriving at campus. In that moment, Clarke had felt that her mother was more excited about her daughter joining a sorority than actually going to college.

     "Clarke, Clarke Griffin." She smiled to the older girl politely. "My mother was actually in this sorority and she always spoke to highly of it, I just couldn't pass up the opportunity to come check it out for myself." Clarke lied, the other girl ate it up and a large grin quickly spread across Maya's face.

     "Oh, I know all about Abigail Griffin!" Maya clapped her hands excitedly. "She is quite the legend in this house. Before your mother, Zeta Beta Theta was one of the lowest ranking sororities on campus, but then Abby Griffin came and lifted us from the ashes. Since then we have been on the top." Maya's face was uplifted and full of pride as she told the story that Clarke had heard a thousand times. "I am so glad you decided to give us a shot. I had heard rumors that we would be meeting a legacy this year." She rested her hand on Clarke's shoulder, and Clarke had to force herself to keep smiling. "Now, why don't you mingle and meet the other girls? I have duties to attend to. It was so nice to meet you, Clarke!" She turned to go before facing Clarke once more and adding, "And if you are anything like your mother, then you are someone we would be happy to have joining us." And with that, the dark haired girl disappeared into the throng of girls. At least it seemed like she had made a good first impression, the only problem was that she wasn't very much like her mother.

     Clarke stood awkwardly at the entrance of the living room watching the other girls converse and laugh, making her feel terribly out of place. She wasn't sure how long she stood there staring when a small brunette with golden tanned skin and light blue-green eyes came bouncing up to her.

     "I could be wrong, but I think the whole point of this is to introduce yourself to everyone." The girl leaned in and eyed Clarke skeptically. "Let me guess, you're only here because of your parents?" she guessed and Clarke cringed.

     "Is it that obvious? I was trying to at least act interested." Clarke sighed.

     "Well then, you are a terrible actress," the girl laughed. "It's okay, I'm only here because of the parties promised. That and my dorm mate is a total bitch, so any excuse to leave the room is accepted with open arms." Clarke laughed and felt herself relax a little.

     "I'm Octavia, by the way." The girl extended her hand for Clarke to shake. "I have a feeling you are the only one here who is cool, so I might not even waste my time on any of these other tools. You can be my new college best friend." Octavia winked playfully and sipped from the plastic cup in her hand.

     "I have a feeling you might be right," Clarke said as she scanned the room, "so I'm in, new best friend." She smiled as she took Octavia's hand and shook on their new found friendship. Maybe this wouldn't be so terrible after all.

     "Oh hey," Octavia's face lit up as she remembered something, "they're having a school year kickoff party tomorrow night for all of the rushes. It's supposed to be ZBT and their brother fraternity. We should totally get ready together." She suggested enthusiastically. "I have been told there will be plenty of booze and lots of hot guys. Besides, I think they might dismiss anyone who doesn't go as being not Zeta Beta Theta material, so you have to go anyways."

     "Uh, yeah, sure," Clarke shrugged. Octavia was nothing if not direct, but it gave her a kind of charm that Clarke knew she wanted to keep around. "You want to come to my dorm since your roommate is such a pain?"

     Octavia's eyes lit up and she looked like she had just been offered the deal of a lifetime. "Thank god, I was hoping you would say that!" Clarke watched her deflate a little in relief. "Now if we want to be pledges, we better get our names and faces out there!" Octavia grabbed Clarke's hand and dragged her toward the other girls in the crowd to whom they were supposed to pander to. "Wow Clarke," Octavia whispered to her new friend after introducing themselves to a few people, "I knew you were here because of your parents, but I didn't realize you were such a legacy! You probably won't even have to pledge, they'll just let you waltz right in!" Clarke rolled her eyes at the girls comment.

     "Trust me, it's not all it's cracked up to be! At least with you they actually care to get to know you as a person, they hear my name and suddenly everything else about me is irrelevant. Like, Hello! I'm my own person, not just a carbon copy of my mom!"

     Octavia laughed at the frustration in her friend's eyes, "I don't know, them not caring who I am as a person sounds pretty sweet to me right now." She pulled Clarke toward the next judge.

 

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      Octavia showed up at Clarke's door the next day with an armful of dresses and a giant purse full of makeup and shoes. Clarke already had a strappy knee length dress picked out that was the perfect combination of classy and sexy that she knew ZBT looked for. She knew this, of course, because her mother had picked it out for her. Abby had almost gotten Clarke a brand new wardrobe of ZBT approved apparel before they left, but Clarke had managed to stop her after a few outfits.

     Clarke curled her hair as her new friend tried on at least five different dresses and asked Clarke for her feedback on each one. Eventually, Octavia picked a small red dress with a high neckline and a deep U exposing her entire back. Clarke helped her pull her hair up in a way that showed off her neck and back. Clarke stuck with her usual light makeup look, while Octavia went a little more dramatic, using a lipstick to match the dark crimson of the dress and a dark smokey eye. Together they could turn any head they passed.

     The party was being thrown at ZBT's brother fraternity house, about a block away from the ZBT house. Large silver letters stood above the door reading "OKP" in the classic Greek font. They could hear the music all the way from the sidewalk as they approached the large dark paneled house which contrasted ZBT's white exterior.

     Maya found them almost as soon as they crossed the threshold. "I am so glad you made it Clarke!" She shouted above the music, only giving Octavia a brief smile. "I know you met all of the girls earlier, now it is time for you to meet our boys." She gestured for them to go socialize before scurrying off to find other people.

    Octavia was almost immediately asked to dance by one of the guys, leaving Clarke once again standing awkwardly in a doorway. Across the room, leaning against the stairway banister, a man wearing a black t-shirt underneath a black blazer that fit perfectly to display his broad shoulders caught her eye. He was the definition of tall, dark, and handsome with strong features underneath a mess of black hair that seemed tempted to curl a little and eyes almost as dark as his clothes. His skin was the kind of tan that made it look warm to the touch, and she could see the faint outline of his chest muscles through the thin cotton. By the time Clarke realized she was staring, he looked over at her with a smile and began to saunter over. Everything about him seemed predatory, this boy was trouble, there was no doubt about it.

     "Bellamy." He introduced himself with a crooked smile, his voice was so deep Clarke almost thought she could feel it rumble in her own chest. Clarke was so stunned it took her a moment to realize that he was waiting for her to return the courtesy.

    "I'm-I'm Clarke." she stammered and she saw his eyes widen slightly in recognition of her name.

     "So you are the infamous Clarke Griffin I have heard so much about." He sounded impressed. "The way Maya has been talking about you, you'd think you were some kind of royalty." He leaned a bit closer to Clarke until his forehead hovered just above hers. It wasn't until then that she noticed the heavy sprinkling of freckles that powdered his sloped nose and smooth cheeks and the small scar that ran down into his upper lip. "So tell me, Princess, do you live up to all of the hype you've caused?" His voice was a low whisper, she was amazed she could hear it above the music in the other room.

     "Depends on what she has been saying?" Clarke's voice was just as low and she felt a blush rise up in her neck and around her ears. She didn’t like the idea that people were already talking about her, or the fact that this man seemed to already think he knew who she was when she knew nothing about him.

     Bellamy straightened away with another smirk. "Oh you know, the usual. Apparently your mom was some big hotshot. You have some pretty big shoes to fill, Princess." He eyed her up and down as if sizing her up. Clarke frowned at this new found nickname, she had a feeling it was going to get real old, real quick.

     "I'd like to think I'm bringing in my own pair of shoes." She puffed out her chest in pride and Bellamy grinned down at her. "I'm more than just my mother's daughter." There was nothing she wanted people to know more than that.

     "I'm glad to see it." He nodded approvingly. "Why don't I get you a drink? You drink beer, right?" He raised an eyebrow as if this were a test.

     "Yes, I drink beer."

     He gave a subtle look of relief at her answer, apparently that had been the answer he was hoping for. "Good. Stay put, Princess." He rushed off into another room with one last look at her over his shoulder before disappearing around the corner.

     Clarke let out a breath when he was out of sight and couldn't help a small smile from creeping across her lips. She had one thing right, this boy was trouble. She wasn't really sure how long she stood there waiting for Bellamy to return, but she had a feeling that getting a beer didn't take this long so she made a decision to investigate. She followed the path she had seen Bellamy take and it led to a small kitchen filled with tubs of ice and beer with a few bottles of harder alcohols mixed in and a couple kegs in the corner. She scanned the faces for one in particular, but moved on when she couldn't spot a single black curl in the crowd. A doorway on the other side of the kitchen led out into a hallway where she found her missing person with his tongue down some red head’s throat and hands in places that should be reserved for a much more private setting. Clarke rolled her eyes and scoffed in disgust, disappointed but not exactly surprised. Her prediction of trouble was proving correct, it only came with an unexpected dose of douche-baggery. It was better that she found out now rather than after she fell victim to his charm. If he tried flirting with her in the future, she now knew to deflect. She wandered the house a little further. The night was still young and she was not going to let some frat boy horndog ruin it for her.

     "You don't exactly look like you are having the time of your life." A voice called out to her as she passed the stairway. That seemed like a bit of an understatement. Clarke turned to see a guy coming down the stairs, his eyes trained on her as he approached. He had dark brown hair that hung around his face, and she had to admit it was a nice face. His features were much softer and rounder than Bellamy's, and Clarke couldn't help but feel pulled in toward the kindness and gentleness that shone in his eyes where Bellamy had only shown predatory power. "It's a party. Shouldn't you be socializing?" He spoke again as he reached the bottom of the stairs.

     "I suppose I could say the same to you." Clarke commented on his solitude and the boy let out a laugh, pushing a few dark strands from around his face behind his ears.

     "Touché." He nodded and raised his beer in a signal of defeat. "If I'm quite honest with you," he leaned in close with a lopsided smile and a glint in his eye, "these parties aren't really my thing." The pulsating mob of people pushed around them causing them to sway towards each other.

     "Isn't that kind of the whole point of joining a fraternity?" Clarke eyed him in mock suspicion.

     He laughed again, the sound light and playful. "I suppose it is." He looked at her a little longer before continuing. "One of my buddies wanted to join and sort of pressured me to come along, but as soon as we got here he of course had other things to worry about and ditched me."

     "I feel your pain. The girl I came with disappeared before we were fully through the door." Clarke frowned. "And if I might be so honest, I'm only here because my mom is determined to have me follow in her footsteps."

    "Well maybe we might offer one another some reprieve." He held out his arm for Clarke to take and guided her into the backyard, where it was considerably quieter and less crowded. "My name is Finn, if you were wondering." He smiled as they sat on the stairs to the back porch. Finn scooted a little closer to Clarke so that their shoulders were touching and Clarke couldn't help but smile a bit.

     "Clarke." She offered and extended her hand toward him. He took it, placing a small kiss on her knuckles and Clarke let out a small laugh at the cheesiness of the little gesture.

     "A pleasure."

     They ended up talking the rest of night until they noticed that the music had stopped and almost everyone had already left the party or turned in for the night. Clarke was amazed at how easy he was to talk to, how well he listened, and how much he seemed to care about what she had to say. He played the part of a perfect gentleman, never making any passes at her or saying anything disrespectful. When it came time to part, he asked her if she might be interested in a date sometime, and Clarke accepted quite enthusiastically.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this chapter does have a lot of Finn in it, but I have to build up their relationship for other things, so bear with me a little longer. Luckily, there is plenty of Bellarke to make up for it.

Clarke and Finn had seen each other twice since the party last Friday, and had even shared their first kiss only a few days before. This had been the highlight of her week so far, especially since classes hadn't started yet so not much else had happened besides listening to Octavia gossip and gush over the guys she met at the party. Before Clarke knew it, it was Friday again and there was yet another party to attend. This one was described as more of a cocktail party than a bash like the last one and Clarke was ever so grateful for it. Her ears were still ringing from the noise of last week. This also gave her and Finn an opportunity to try out their blossoming relationship with the others around, not that they were calling it a relationship just yet.

Octavia came over early once again so that they could help each other get ready, this time going for a more elegant look than before. Clarke's blue dress made her eyes pop, and Octavia's black dress gave her a more refined and mature look without lessening her beauty. This time the event was taking place at the sorority house, and Clarke was grateful for the shorter walk since the heels she had chosen to wear were less than comfortable. Clarke mentally cursed her choice in footwear and prayed that come morning she would be blister free.

When they arrived at the house, there were already a few of the OKP men loitering around, and the place was decorated much more elaborately than the last time Clarke had been there. Finn found them almost immediately and placed a short sweet kiss on her lips before bustling off to get her a drink. Bellamy filled the cold air beside her before Finn was fully out of sight.

"I missed you the other night, you disappeared on me." Bellamy leaned close to Clarke and whispered in her ear, sending a chill down Clarke's back.

"Yes, I didn't want to interrupt you and your new red-headed friend. You two seemed quite cozy." Clarke replied with a snide grin.

Instead of reacting with any shame, Bellamy only smiled fondly at the memory. "Oh yes, I almost forgot about that." He let out a short quiet laugh as if remembering an old joke, and Clarke could only frown up at him. "I had every intention of finding you afterwards though, I swear it." He made an X over his heart noncommittally.

"Well I can't say I'm too upset over it, besides it was probably for the best. I met someone who is much more worthy of my time and attention." Clarke smiled proudly.

"Oh," Bellamy frowned, "you mean Finn?" He said the other man’s name as if it were a dirty word. Although, Clarke had no doubt that Bellamy had no problem saying any dirty word. "I should have known you liked the pretty boys," he scoffed and took a swig of his drink before leaning in so close that his lips brushed Clarke's ear when he spoke. "Tell me Princess, does it make you wet when he paints you flowers and braids your hair," he mocked.

Clarke's open palm made contact with Bellamy's cheek with a sharp snap before she could stop herself. Bellamy pulled away, hand covering where she had struck him in surprise, and raised his eyebrows in a way that said he was impressed. It wasn't exactly the reaction she was hoping for, but she was coming to expect that from him.

"God, you are even more of a pig than I thought you were!" Clarke fumed and had to resist the urge to hit him again when he smiled down at her as she turned red from anger. "You're disgusting!" She snapped at his amused expression and stormed away to find Finn, silently grateful that no one else had seemed to notice their little altercation in the corner.

Clarke was so angry that she almost didn't stop in time to keep herself from colliding straight into Finn as he turned the corner with two drinks in hand.

"Woah! Slow down, turbo!" He laughed as he moved his arms in a counteraction to keep the drinks from spilling over both of them. It didn't take him long to notice Clarke's expression, "Hey, you alright?" He handed her the drink and touched her shoulder comfortingly.

"I'm fine." Clarke gave her best fake smile and Finn watched, slightly concerned, as she downed her champagne in a single gulp.

Months went on without much change. Bellamy and she were at each other’s throats every time they were left in a room together, and Clarke would always leave ready to strangle somebody while he watched her in amusement. He almost seemed to get off on their little spats, her spitting insults as fast as she could and him always ready with the perfect comeback. Even when Clarke was able to get the last word, she always left feeling as if he had won.

Her relationship with Finn grew into something beautiful, and anytime one of them would go anywhere without the other, people would ask where the missing member was. They were inseparable and happy. Clarke found it hard to remember the last time she had felt this happy and comfortable in a relationship. It also seemed as if Octavia had become an almost permanent fixture, not only in Clarke's life, but in her dorm as well. At one point, Clarke had complained to Octavia about Bellamy only to find out that he was, in fact, her brother. Clarke racked her brain or a time when she could ever even recall seeing them talking to one another or even in the same room.

"Well, I'm sorry to tell you, but your brother is a huge ass wipe." Clarke fumed as she pinned her hair up, almost stabbing herself in the skull with a bobby pin in her rage.

"Don't I know it!" Octavia had laughed in response. "Imagine living with him!" Clarke cringed at the thought. Although, despite all of Octavia’s teasing, the affection in her voice when she spoke of her brother was obvious.

Pledging had become exhausting with a party almost every weekend and ‘bonding sessions’ for the new girls and their Bigs multiple times a week. Clarke swore she spent more time at the ZBT house than in her own dorm. But once Halloween came around, all of the other parties appeared to have been practice for what she walked into. It was held at the Omega Kappa Phi house and was open to anyone who wanted to stop by. Clarke felt like there had to have been more people in that house than she had seen in her whole life put together. They had been preparing decorations for the party for what felt like a month. Clarke had been happy to do some of the artwork required in the decorations, they could finally give her a task she was actually good at. Clarke waded through the crowd, looking for Finn, when a dark figure stepped out in front of her. She let out a sigh of frustration as familiar black curls and freckles closed the distance between them.

"I see you went the traditional route and dressed as a skank." Bellamy smirked at her nurse's costume which was suddenly feeling much too short and low cut under Bellamy's scrutinizing stare. "And here I was, hoping you would come as a Princess." There was a look in his eyes that held something more than mockery at that statement and it made Clarke squirm. It was hard for her not to notice the ways his cop costume clung to the muscles along his arms and shoulders, and the way the smooth planes of his chest sat half exposed by the open shirt.

"And I see you went with the timeless classic of 'Douchebag with an over inflated ego'. That one never gets old Bellamy." Clarke glared up at him. "Now, if you don't mind, I do believe I am looking for an astronaut." Clarke tried to push past, but Bellamy moved to block her path once more.

"He's probably upstairs somewhere searching for his balls." He always adopted a bitter tone whenever the topic of Finn came up.

"Oh, I can attest, they are intact." Bellamy frowned deeply at her words. "But even without them, he would still be more of a man than you are." She hissed back at him, but it just brought a sly smirk back to his face as he inched closer to her until Clarke found herself backed against wall.

Bellamy proceeded forward until his chest was touching hers and hovered his face over hers. Clarke could feel his warm breath dancing on her lips. "Oh Princess," he breathed, "you haven't had a real man yet." His fingers stroked her cheek and placed a loose curl behind her ear, his lips still inches from her own. Clarke held her breath as her eyes danced back and forth between the impossibly dark ones just in front of her, she couldn't even tell where his pupils ended and his iris began. It took Clarke longer than she was proud to admit to gather her senses and push him back.

"Don't you have some drunk girl to pressure into a closet somewhere?" She snapped, her words tumbling out in a desperate attempt to regain face.

"Not much pressure needed, Princess," he winked and turned to go, but not without first sneaking in a hard smack on Clarke's ass. She let out a low growl and found an empty cup to chuck at his retreating back. Did he have to be such a jackass or was it all just for her?

Clarke quickly found the alcohol, took a quick shot to calm her back down, and then headed upstairs to find her actually charming, non-asshole boyfriend. But even after she found Finn, she couldn't fully wind down from her episode with Bellamy earlier. He was getting in her head. He had always had a problem with personal space, leaning in too close and brushing up against her every chance he got, but tonight felt like he has crossed a line by backing her into a corner like that. He wasn’t really about to kiss her, was he? She fumed and speculated all night, throwing back a shot every time they happened to run into Bellamy, who seemed like he had a new girl on his arm every time. How could he being having such a good time while Clarke was on the verge of slashing the tires on his precious truck?

"You okay babe?" Finn eyed her as she took what had to have been her seventh shot that night.

"I'm fine." Clarke growled and shot a glare at Bellamy's figure dancing with some girl that Clarke didn't recognize. "Can you even call that dancing?" Clarke thought out loud, pointing to the scene. "More like public fornication." She rolled her eyes and scoffed.

"Has Bellamy been giving you a hard time again?" Finn took her hand and forced her to tear her eyes away from the pair.

"How can you stand to be friends with him? I would kill somebody if I had to share a house with that arrogant ass." She scowled and Finn rested his forehead against hers, his eyes trying to call her back to him.

"I don't understand what it is with you two. Yeah, sometimes he does dumb stuff, but he's really not that bad." Finn pulled her in close, trying to lighten the mood. "Forget about him!" He tugged her out of the room so that Bellamy was no longer visible. "Have some fun! If you let him ruin your night it just means he wins!"

Clarke sighed and straightened her back. "You're right. Screw him." She pulled Finn back into the room and into the crowd of dancing people far enough from Bellamy that he wouldn't bother them, but close enough that they could see each other. "Let's show them we can have a little fun too." Clarke felt herself smirk as she started to dance, trying to forget that she was still mad.

They hadn't been at it very long when Clarke felt a pair of eyes watching her every move. She tried to shake it off at first, thinking it was just in her head, but after a few more minutes went by and the feeling did not go away she was force to look around. Never stopping the sway of her hips, she scanned the crowd and found herself staring back into a pair of black eyes, his look intensifying as their gazes locked.

There was something in Bellamy's stare that Clarke could not quite put her finger on, but it made her stomach tighten in an unfamiliar way. Somewhere inside, she almost wished he had been glaring or watching her distastefully, that she at least knew how to handle. This look felt too exposed, like she was seeing something she wasn't supposed to, but Bellamy wouldn’t look away or try to hide it. He just watched Clarke, his partner rubbing up against him with him hardly noticing. They both continued their dance and the rest of the room just faded away, there was only Bellamy, herself, and that look. She didn't know how long they had stayed like that, it felt like an eternity later when Finn pulled her in for kiss and broke the spell. After that, Bellamy disappeared, with some girl Clarke assumed, and they didn't see him for the rest of the night.

 

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"Your brother was being really weird the other night." Clarke said to Octavia in a hushed tone over breakfast at the house a few days later. Clarke had not been able to get Bellamy's strange lingering looks out of her mind since the party. Clarke had scolded herself, telling herself that was exactly what he wanted. But there had been something in his eyes as he watched her dance that tugged at Clarke, a silent plea of some sort that made the hairs on her arms stand up when she thought about it. And she wasn't entirely sure it was in a bad way.

Octavia looked up from her food and stared at her friend as if Clarke had just started speaking Mandarin. "He's always really weird." She said between mouthfuls, an eyebrow raised in suspicion. Clarke mentally kicked herself for saying anything, the only time they ever spoke of Octavia's brother was when Clarke was complaining about some stupid stunt he had pulled at her expense or when Octavia was complaining about him scaring off any boys he caught talking to her. Bellamy was insanely protective of his sister, which Clarke found a little ironic considering he treated every other girl like trash. "Especially with you." Octavia added under her breath.

"Yeah," Clarke mused with a slight frown and poked her food around her plate with her fork. She told herself to drop it, Bellamy's sister wouldn't exactly want to hear about the weird tension Clarke had felt at the Halloween party. "This just-I don't know, this just felt different."

"What was he doing?" Octavia squinted at her friend. She was getting really suspicious now. Octavia had tried talking to her big brother after Clarke had first complained about him harassing her, but he had gotten strangely defensive and accused Clarke of starting it. Since then, the subject of Clarke had felt like something of a forbidden topic between the two siblings so Octavia had just let it go. However Clarke was clearly bothered by whatever had transpired earlier that week, and not in the way that she normally was. If her bull-headed brother was crossing lines she felt she needed to know so she could properly intervene.

"I don't know," Clarke ran a hand through her blonde curls and shook her head with a small laugh. "I was probably just imagining it. I did have quite a bit to drink that night!" Clark had told herself that excuse a hundred times since Halloween night, but she could see in Octavia's eyes that her friend believed her just about as much as she believed herself.

"Well, if he was being extra weird, I haven't heard anything that would explain it." Octavia offered, trying to ease the heavy feeling that had fallen on their end of the breakfast table. "From what I can tell, he is the same old jackass he always is." Octavia paused to take a bite. "He was probably just trying to find a new way to get into your head, and it obviously worked!" Clarke sighed, she was probably right. She could see his face again in that moment, his eyes calling to her, begging her to listen to his silent plea. It seemed so important that she just listen.

"Do you know what you are going to do for Finn's birthday?" Octavia asked, changing the subject.

Finn's birthday was just after Winter break, and Clarke had not been able to come up with any ideas for a gift or what to plan. She didn't even know what she would get him for Christmas, but there was still plenty of time to come up with something. She still had a few months to think of something amazing. “I am totally stumped. Why are guys so much harder to buy for than girls?” Clarke joked, she had always been too much of a perfectionist to be nonchalant about gift giving. "Besides, first I have to worry about finals and Christmas!"

Octavia laughed, "Oh please, you have to worry about finals way less than anyone else in this house I bet. Your grades are dangerously close to nerd worthy!" Octavia pointed a speared strawberry at Clarke with an accusing look.

"I'm not going to apologize for having pride in my grades and actually trying. And don't come crying to me when you aren't ready for finals because you were too busy getting your buzz on the night before." Clarke defended herself and received a scrunched face from her friend that had guilty written all over it.

"I can't help it if there are so many good parties happening. I am not ashamed!" Octavia sent her friend a coy smile and popped the strawberry into her mouth.

Clarke let out a laugh, "Of course not, O. I'm not entirely sure you are capable of shame."

It was Octavia's turn to laugh. "You only live once Clarke! Try not to take it so seriously."

 

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The remainder of the semester went by without incident. Ever since Halloween, Bellamy seemed determined to up his game, and Clarke could swear he waited around every corner for her so that he could get a few more jabs in anytime Finn wasn't paying attention. It seemed the more heated the argument got, the more Bellamy's eyes would shine. He reveled in it. Clarke knew this should have deterred her, but it only egged her on more. In fact, over time she found herself seeking Bellamy out herself when he was making himself scarce. The night just didn’t seem complete without it.

Finals came in the second week of December, ending on Thursday and leading into the three week break between semesters for everyone to go home for the holidays. ZBT and OKP had two big parties planned to end the semester on. Thursday night would feature a rager to celebrate the end of finals and the beginning of break, then on Saturday night, Friday being a recovery day, there would be a formal winter themed party that seemed their version of a Christmas party.

That week, the whole house was stressed, sleep deprived, and extremely on edge. Octavia had been running around with pencils sticking out of her messy bun and eyeliner smudged from continuously rubbing her eyes over open textbooks. Clarke had a mind for retaining information when it was first shared so a quick scan of her notes a few hours before a test were all she really needed to get a good grade, a fact which had caused Octavia to express her hatred of Clarke countless times throughout the week.

Octavia had come to her at one point, almost in tears with calculus book in hand, begging for help since Clarke had taken calculus in high school. At one point, Clarke had even run into Bellamy in the library and much to Clarke surprise all she had gotten was a frustrated grunt before he went back to reading. Something about seeing the normally well-groomed Bellamy with his curls in a wild mess, a few days of stubble darkening his jaw, and his clothes in wrinkled disarray had made Clarke smile. She had even stopped to admire him for a moment, watching him sit at his table chewing the butt of his pen and mumbling the words that he was reading to himself as he tried to embed them into is memory. She told herself that it was just nice to see him on a moment of weakness since he was always so well put together, at least she told herself that was all that it was and mentally kicked herself when he looked back up and caught her staring. She had almost walked into a bookshelf trying to walk away like nothing had happened.

Clarke had just sent in her paper that served as the final to her Lit professor when there was a knock on her dorm room door. Her roommate was out at the library and Clarke knew she was definitely not expecting any company since everyone that she knew was currently in a half-dead zombie state. Clarke opened the door with a frown of confusion on her face which only deepened when she saw who was there.

"What the f-" Clarke started, but was cut off by her guest clearing his throat.

Bellamy towered in her doorway, still unshaven, but this time he was wearing more characteristic clothes of a well fitted black henley and dark jeans. His brow was furrowed and his lips were pursed in frustration and a hint of embarrassment, in his large hands was some sort of Biology textbook.

"What are you doing here, Bellamy?" Clarke's eyebrows shot up and she looked up and down the hallway, waiting for someone to jump out and do the rest of the prank.

"I, uh- O suggested...O said you were good at this kind of stuff," he gestured to his textbook and Clarke couldn't suppress the look of shock as she realized what was happening. "And I was hoping, maybe, you could, you know..." He stumbled through his sentence as if it physically pained him to ask her for help.

"You expect me to help you?" Clarke asked, still in shock, and had to keep from laughing at the idea. Bellamy winced at the word 'help' and ran a nervous hand over the back of his neck.

"Look, Princess, you know I wouldn't be here if I wasn't desperate." He closed his eyes as he spoke and his eyebrows drew together so tightly that Clarke feared they might merge into one.

"Shouldn't you be done with your GE courses by now?" Clarke asked, shifting her weight onto one foot, her hands on her hips.

"God, you sound like my mother!" Bellamy cried and shot Clarke an exasperated glare. "This is the last one I need, and I just-I suck at science and O said you were some kind of science nerd or something. So will you help me or not?" He was dangerously close to yelling as he spoke.

"Not with that attitude! If you're going to be a dick, then screw you!" She moved to slam the door in his face, but he was too fast and wedged his foot in before it was able to close.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" He shoved his shoulder in through the door, causing it to push open a bit more. "I'm just…I'm stressed and I really really don't want to be here. Trust me, if I had anyone else I could ask I would. I don't like it any more than you do, in fact probably a lot less. So please. Please." He pleaded with her.

"I have to say, Bellamy, watching you beg is pretty awesome." Clarke couldn't help but smile at the pathetic image in front of her. She had to suppress a laugh as he visibly fought making a comment about begging.

"I'm gonna let that go," his voice was calm, but she could see it was torture for him to not make the remark that was so easily set up by her comment, "because I need your help, and I promise not to be an ass as long as you help me." He offered a forced smile, and Clarke let go of the door. "Is that a yes?" His eyes lit up a little as he pushed the door back open and took a hesitant step into her room when she finally nodded.

Bellamy did a slow scan of the room, his eyes finally landing on Clarke with a small smile. Clarke shifted her weight uncomfortably, this was definitely a situation she never imagined herself in, her arch nemesis seating himself on her purple plaid comforter.

"So this is where the princess slumbers?" His eyes sparkled in amusement as he continued eyeing her belongings once more. "I must admit, it is much more modest than I had imagined." His eyes found Clarke once again and he patted the bed next to him, a smirk spreading across his features. "I promise not to bite." He winked causing Clarke to frown.

"I believe you promised not to be an ass." Clarke pointed out in a scolding tone.

Bellamy's smile grew. "I'm sorry." He bowed his head, "It's just hard to turn off sometimes. If you can bear with me for just an hour or so, I promise to make it up to you." Clarke raised her eyebrows questioningly causing him to add, "Somehow. I haven't thought that far ahead."

Clarke rolled her eyes and pulled a chair up to the side of the bed, making a conscious decision not to sit beside him on the bed. "What do you need help with?" She asked.

Bellamy frowned and nodded to his book. "Biology." He stated bluntly as if that were the stupidest question he had ever heard.

Clarke sighed and smacked her lips in frustration. "Yeah, I got that much." She struggled to keep her voice calm, but her irritation peaked out in her tone, she was already regretting the decision to help. "I mean which parts?" She prodded.

His frown deepened, "The biology part." Clarke found herself extremely close to strangling the boy in front of her.

"I can't teach you a whole course in one night, Bellamy!"

"Just the highlights." He pleaded. "I mean, I guess I understand the basics, but then there is all of this extra shit. Like how the fuck am I supposed to remember all the stupid little parts of the cells and what they do? And what the hell is the difference between prokaryotic and eukaryotic..." He had his book open now and was listing chapter names that he didn't understand, his brow scrunched in frustration. "I'm majoring in History, when am I ever going to use this shit." He ran a hand through his already messy curls and looked up at Clarke to find her smiling at him, she fought back a small laugh as his face switched to a mixture of concern and confusion at her amusement. "What?"

"I'm sorry." she stifled another laugh. "I'm sorry. It's just kind of funny." She gestured to him.

"Are you making fun of me?" His voice got defensive making Clarke put her hands up in peace.

"No, I'm sorry." She took a deep breath to calm her giggles and recomposed herself. "It's just... it's kind of nice seeing you like this, all frustrated and disheveled. It's almost humanizing." She smiled.

"I can see how you might mistake me for a god." He winked, that stupid smirk back on his lips.

Clarke rolled her eyes. "I was thinking more along the lines of a demon, you know spawn of Satan sort of thing." Bellamy feigned offense and Clarke turned his attention back to the book and they got on with the study session.

"You know," Bellamy said over a slice of pizza a few hours later when they had decided to take a break and order some dinner, "when O said you were a science nerd I just thought she meant you were really smart or something, I hadn't realized that this was something you actually enjoyed. I feel like that must takes it to a whole new level of nerd." He spoke through a mouthful of pizza.

"I never said I loved it." Clarke said after sending Bellamy a warning look.

Bellamy let out something between a scoff and a laugh. "Oh please Princess, you aren't fooling anyone. The way you get all excited as you talk, you love it. Anyone could tell it’s something that you are passionate about."

"I just think it's something that is actually important, you know. It explains how the world works around us. I mean look at you or me," she gestured with her food, "we’re just sacks of blood and bone but at just the right settings and in just the right combination we become so much more. Science explains everything. Life is confusing and scary, but if you look at science it's like a road map to the universe."

Bellamy grinned at her as she spoke, almost forgetting his food. "I don't think it can explain everything." His voice was quiet when he spoke and something in his eyes made Clarke flash back to Halloween. She cleared her throat.

"We should get back to it, if you want to be ready for your final tomorrow we still have quite a bit of material to cover. Maybe next semester you might consider actually attending a few classes and you won't be so lost." She picked up his textbook and started thumbing through pages, acutely aware of Bellamy's eyes watching her.

By the time eleven rolled around, Clarke was stifling yawns left and right, and Bellamy was listening to Clarke with closed eyes half of the time. He sat on the floor next to her bed, using the side as a back rest, his head occasionally falling back to hit the mattress before jerking back to attention. It was strange how eleven was still early when they were partying, but studying until eleven had left them both feeling drained and exhausted.

Clarke nudged Bellamy's shoulder with her foot as his head lolled to the side. "Hm, what? I'm listening." His head shot up and he sat a little straighter.

"We should probably call it a night, Bellamy. We both have exams tomorrow." Clarke said through a yawn. Bellamy gave a sleepy frown but nodded.

"You're right." He groaned as he stood up from his place on the floor. He stretched his back and Clarke couldn't help but glance at the strip of exposed skin on his stomach when his shirt lifted a bit. "I shouldn't have stayed this long to begin with. I do believe I only asked for an hour originally." His smile was lopsided with need for sleep. "Thanks."

"Just try to make it back without dying." Clarke ushered him toward the door. "I would hate all of this to be for nothing." He laughed and stood outside her door as if waiting for something or trying to decide what to say. Clarke spoke instead, "Good night, Bellamy." She shooed him away with her hand and closed the door on him still standing there.

"Good night Princess." She heard his voice through the closed door, shortly followed by the sound of his footsteps retreating down the hall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone who has read my story so far and left Kudos! I appreciate all of you so much! This is the first piece of writing that I have ever shared with the world, so it is nice to know that it is not complete shit haha


	3. Winter Break

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All of you that have followed me on this journey are amazing! I love you all! You're so encouraging!

     Clarke showed up at the house Thursday night a little late. The party had started around two hours ago, but Clarke had ended up with a late time slot for her last final and hadn't even had time to change out of her jeans for the party. At least this wasn't the fancy one. So, Clarke arrived in the clothes that she had worn to class, hair in a ponytail, and almost no makeup. She felt some of the girls give her weird looks as she walked through the house, they had this unspoken rule in ZBT that you always had to dress up for events. No jeans. No ponytails. Clarke was breaking both of these rules, but she didn't care. What would they do? Kick her out of the sorority? How terrible.

     Clarke scanned each room for somebody that she actually wanted to talk to, when a deep voice stopped her in her tracks.

     "I see you went all out dressing up for this one, Princess." Bellamy's mocking voice came from behind her.

     "I see you remembered how to shave." Clarke shot right back in a light voice. Although, she was a little sad to see the stubble on his jaw gone.

     "Where is your Prince Charming? Isn't he normally glued to your hip at these things? There wouldn't be any trouble in paradise, would there?" He asked in a smug tone, one eyebrow raised.

     "Actually, we couldn't be happier." Clarke sneered. "Although I know healthy relationships are something of a foreign concept to you." Clarke made sure her voice was laced with annoyance, but in truth she was happy to see that their little study session hadn't changed things between them. She had been a little worried that it would make things awkward, or that he would try to buddy up to her, but they were back in their groove as if nothing had ever happened. Bellamy let out a short laugh, and then Clarke watched his face drop all amusement. In its place, came something close to rage, she watched the muscles in his jaw clench matched with the usual nostril flare as he looked over her shoulder. Clarke turned her head and saw Octavia behind them, pressed up against a wall clinging frantically to a tall tanned guy with a shaved head and tattoos.

     "Excuse me, Princess," Bellamy cracked his neck, his lips pursed together so tightly that they were turning white, "it seems I have someone's nose to bash in." And with that, he stalked over to his little sister. Clarke winced as he peeled the guy off of her and landed a fist squarely on his jaw. Clarke could see Octavia explode at her brother and the screaming match between the two siblings began.

     "If he's not careful, she is never going to find a boyfriend," Finn whispered in her ear as he slipped his arms around her waist from behind, nuzzling her neck.

     "I kind of think that's the point." Clarke smiled and leaned into him.

     "I suppose you're right." Finn laughed, and the air tickled her neck.

     Just then, Bellamy spotted them and stopped mid-shout. Octavia didn't seem to notice and continued on her rampage, but Bellamy's face changed from annoyed anger at his sister to something else. His eyes locked with Clarke's, and she found herself feeling compelled to wiggle out of Finn's hold and create distance between her boyfriend and herself. Bellamy looked sharply away and stalked off into the crowd, leaving his sister still screaming after him.

     "You okay, babe?" Finn asked when she pulled away. He reached for her hand, pulling her back, a concerned look on his face.

     "Yeah, sorry." Clarke tore her eyes away from where Bellamy had been standing moments before, and turned her attention back to Finn. "I'm just tired." She offered a weak smile.

     Finn brushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear and smiled. "Yeah, this week has been a little exhausting for everyone." His grinned turned mischievous and he tugged Clarke closer. "If you want, we can just go up to my room and lay down for a bit. We don't have to stay at the party. We both made an appearance, they won't notice if we just disappear."

     "Yeah, that sounds nice." She smiled back at him and let him pull her through crowd, up the stairs, and down the hall to his little bedroom.

     They could still hear the sound of the music downstairs through the closed door and walls, but it was muffled enough that they could relax. He pulled her down onto the bed next to him, positioning her as the little spoon against him, and wrapping himself around her. Finn rambled on about his day and his finals, speaking softly into her hair. Clarke found her mind wandering, and a few times she began nodding off to sleep, Finn's voice a constant comfort against the drone of the music in the background.

     "Finn." Clarke interrupted him with a sleepy whisper. Finn immediately stopped talking and planted a kiss on the back of Clarke's head.

     "Hm?"

     "I love you." She felt his smile grow against the back of her head, and his arms repositioned to hold her a little tighter.

     "I love you too, Clarke."  He leaned up after placing a kiss at the base of her neck to take in her face for a moment. "You know we've been seeing each other for four months and that's the first time you've told me that you loved me." Clarke twisted her body so she was on her back, looking up at him. His hair fell around his face as he hovered over her, a soft smile gracing his features.

     "It never felt like something that needed to be said, it just was." Clarke smiled up at him and brushed his hair out of his eyes for a moment, brushing his cheek with the back of her fingers. The gesture was hopeless, the strands just fell back into place as soon as she let go.

     "And now?" He asked, his lips hovering above hers.

     "I just want to make sure you know." His lips were on hers before she fully finished the sentence. Just as the kiss was deepening, there was a pounding at the door.

     Finn froze, and his eyes closed in frustration. A familiar deep basso voice came rumbling through the door, "Finn, you're needed downstairs.”

     "If we are really quiet, maybe he will just go away." Finn whispered and continued kissing down Clarke's neck. The pounding continued.

     "I know you are in there. Sexy time is over lovebirds, get your ass out here, Finn. House business calls." Bellamy's voice came through once again, this time sounding a little more impatient. Finn actively ignored him. "I really don't want to see what you two are doing, but I will open this door if you do not." Bellamy threatened and Finn let out a groan and slid off of Clarke, straightened his shirt, and cracked the door just enough for Bellamy to look in. He spotted Clarke on the bed, propped up on her elbows and frowned.

     "What do you want, Bellamy?" Finn growled. Bellamy glanced at the shorter boy and scrunched his eyebrows together, looked back at Clarke for a moment, and then settled a hard stare back on Finn.

     "Downstairs." He rumbled. "You guys have been up here too long, attendance is mandatory." Clarke rolled her eyes, he was making shit up.

     "You've got to be kidding." Finn sounded pretty pissed.

     "Don't argue with me." Bellamy growled down to him. "Downstairs." He pointed, and Finn gave him one last defiant look before trudging out of the room. "You too, Princess." He gestured for Clarke to get off of the bed and head back to the party. She hit him with her shoulder as she walked by. "Hey, don't get mad at me. I don't make the rules." He sounded smug, and Clarke turned on her heel to face him.

     "Oh, that's bullshit, and you know it!'" She shoved his chest. He took a step back, but it didn't have anything to do with Clarke's strength. "You sneak off with girls at every single party you go to, and we disappear for five minutes because we don't want to deal with the bullshit parade you guys are putting on downstairs, and you just can't help but stick your nose where it doesn't belong." Clarke shouted. She couldn't seem to stop the words as they came tumbling out of her mouth.

     "Oh, don't get mad at me, Princess, just because you can't keep your pants on." He shouted back and took a step back toward her.

     "Shouldn't you be more concerned about your sister keeping her pants on?" Clarke hadn't wanted to bring Octavia into this, but she knew it was what got to Bellamy best, so she couldn't stop herself. "You should probably make sure she isn't down there with her boyfriend again, because god forbid you let her actually be happy."

     "Boyfriend?" Bellamy's eyebrows shot up into his hair and his voice lowered half an octave. "O has a boyfriend?" Clarke mentally kicked herself. Octavia had made her promise not to tell her brother about her new boyfriend, Lincoln, and here Clarke was running her mouth because that was just the effect that Bellamy Blake had on her. "Since when?" He growled and tried to push past Clarke down the hall in the direction of the stairs. Clarke stepped in front of him and put her hands up to stop Bellamy's warpath.

     "Maybe, she would tell you this stuff if you were always such an ass about it!" She was suddenly very aware of where her hands were resting on his chest in an attempt to keep him in his place. She dropped them to her sides. "She's happy! Just let her be happy."

     "Yeah, she's happy now until he breaks her heart!" He looked over Clarke's shoulder at the stairs, and Clarke could see him physically struggle not to go running down. "What happens when he cheats on her? Or decides he is bored with her? She won't be very happy then! And then you know who is left to pick up her pieces? Me and you. I can't see her like that. I will literally kill him if he hurts her." His gaze and his voice softened as he spoke, his eyes almost looking scared. He avoided Clarke's gaze, this was too personal for them.

     "Just because you’re a lying, cheating horndog, doesn't mean that every guy is." Clarke retorted in an attempt to get the mood back toward familiar ground. The fear in his eyes over his sister was too much exposure for Clarke, and they were getting dangerously close to feelings territory.

     "Hey Princess," his voice was in defense mode as he replaced his mask of amused indifference, "I do have some moral integrity. I have never cheated on anyone. That is where I draw the line."

     "Have you ever been in a relationship serious enough that cheating was even a possibility?" Clarke asked with raised eyebrows.

     "Well, if we are splitting hairs!" Bellamy threw his hands up in mock defense. He fell silent, and his face grew serious again. "I'm assuming it was the big guy I decked earlier? I mean I know my sister has a fire in her pants, but if she is serious enough to call him her boyfriend then I can't imagine she'd be here macking on other guys."

     "A fire in her pants? Must be hereditary." Clarke rolled her eyes. "Ugh, yes! It was the big guy!" Clarke broke under Bellamy's stare when she didn't answer him. "His name is Lincoln, and he is actually pretty decent from what I've seen." Clarke continued trying to reassure him, then after a moment added, "And you didn't find out from me!”

     Bellamy laughed. "And miss an opportunity to watch the perfect little Princess get in trouble?"

     "If you say anything, I will chop your precious little bits off and feed them to you!" She punched his arm and he flinched letting out a laugh, and gave her a look that clearly said 'no promises'. "I'm serious Bellamy! You keep your fat mouth shut!" She continued hitting him. He backed down the hallway in an attempt to avoid her flailing fists, and didn't stop laughing until he was backed against the wall.

     "Okay, Princess, calm down. Calm down." His voice still full of laughter as he grabbed her wrists to hold her still. "I promise not to say anything! No need for violence!" He was holding her wrists against his chest where he had a better grasp, and Clarke fidgeted in their close proximity. Clarke stared at his long fingers wrapped around her slender wrists, entranced. "What's the matter, Princess?" His thumb started caressing her pale skin in slow, smooth motions and Clarke swallowed. She could feel his heartbeat through the thin fabric of his shirt. "You always get so tense when I'm too close. Does it make you nervous?" Clarke's eyes shot back up to Bellamy's face, his voice was as smooth as butter as he spoke. "Is it me you don't trust? Or yourself?" His eyes glittered, and Clarke did not know when he had moved, but his face was suddenly a lot closer to hers.

     "You." Clarke answered, her voice barely audible, she wondered how much truth was really in that statement. She suddenly realized she had been holding her breath, and let out a shaky breath.

     Bellamy's eyes darkened at the word, and he looked scorned. "Whatever helps you sleep better at night, Princess." He dropped her wrists harshly. "You should probably go find Prince Charming. He's probably worried." And with that, he stalked away with a scowl.

     Clarke wandered downstairs a minute after Bellamy left to find Finn. Maybe he could get her mind off of Bellamy's strange behavior. Because he was being strange... very strange, and it had left Clarke with an empty, guilty feeling in the pit of her stomach. It was a feeling she wasn't sure she could figure out even if she let herself analyze it, but she really didn't want to think about it.

     "What took you so long?" Finn called to her once she spotted him in the crowd. "I was about to go look for you." He pulled her into an embrace.

     "Sorry." She shook her head, ridding herself of all thoughts of Bellamy Blake. "I had to rip Bellamy a new one for being such a jerk."

     "Ah. I should have stuck around, I would definitely have liked to see that one. And it would also explain why Bellamy is now going around with a stick up his butt. Glad to know it was my girl who put it there." He gave a broad smile and kissed her.

     "You know, I don't think he will bother us again tonight, if you want to go back up and finish what we started?" Clarke raised an eyebrow suggestively and Finn's face burst with pleasant surprise as she tugged him back toward the staircase. The pair froze as Bellamy stormed by, mumbling something about Octavia under his breath. "Maybe we should still be sneaky about it, just in case," Clarke whispered, and as soon as he was out of sight, they sprinted for the stairs and up in a fit of giggles.

     The next morning, Clarke left the OKP house, and had to maneuver the maze of bodies who decided that the floor was a wonderful place to fall asleep in their drunken stupor. She got back to her dorm just as her roommate was leaving with her bags to go home for the holidays. Clarke had the wonderful plan to fall into her own bed and catch up on sleep for the week. She had all of today off and then the formal tomorrow. She would leave for home Sunday morning. She contemplated what she would do with her free time as she lay in bed, suddenly unable to fall asleep as planned. Everyone that she knew was going to be extremely hung over and not very fun. She guessed she could be a good friend and take care of Octavia, or she could make plans with Finn who hadn't had time to drink very much at the party and would therefore be hangover free. Or, she could just hide in her room all day, which sounded very tempting, and with that thought she dozed off.

 

\-----------------------------------------------

 

     Clarke stared at her reflection in the mirror before heading over to the ZBT house. Tonight was the formal holiday party that officially closed out the semester. Clarke smoothed the silky material of her pale blue dress which was floor length and strapless, with a fitted bodice, and a black sash tied around her waist. The color complimented her eyes, and the fit accentuated her curves. This dress truly made her feel like the princess that Bellamy was so convinced she was. That thought almost made her change until she looked at the clock and realized it was time to go.

     The house was softly lit when she entered, and sparkly paper snowflakes hung from pins in the ceiling. Finn approached, looking dapper in his suit, his hair combed back out of his face. "You look a vision." He beamed at her, and gave her a kiss.

     "You clean up pretty nice yourself." Clarke winked at him playfully.

     "I believe I saw some champagne in the other room, would m’lady like some?"

     "Ugh, if I am going to be expected to have a stupid smile screwed on my face all night, I might need some social lubricant."

     "If you're not careful, one day one of them will hear you." Finn whispered in her ear, his lips brushing the curls by her temple. 

     "That's why I'm always careful." Clarke smiled, and Finn pulled her close to his hip as they walked.

     The night droned on, full of meaningless small talk about everyone's plans for the holidays, and who they were excited to see. Near the end of the night, Clarke excused herself to the ladies room for no other reason than to escape for a moment. She walked down the empty hallway when a hand grabbed her by the arm and pulled her into the nearest room.

     "What the-" Clarke shouted as she turned to face her abductor. Bellamy Blake stared back at her, a smirk on his lips. "What are you doing?" Clarke whispered angrily, the last thing she needed was to be caught in the coat closet with Bellamy.

     "Sorry, I have been waiting for your leech to let you go all night, and I figured this was going to be the only chance I got." Bellamy found himself whispering as well. Clarke frowned at his reference to Finn, and then reverted back to confusion.

     "What are you talking about? Are you drunk?"

     Bellamy let out a hushed chuckle. "No, Princess, for once in my life, I am not drunk. I just figured this might be weird if Finn was hovering." Clarke continued to stare at him in confusion as he fished around in his suit pocket. Clarke took a moment to admire the fact that Bellamy was the kind of man who knew how to wear a suit. He looked sharp. "I got you something," he whispered as he pulled a small box out of his pocket.

     Clarke's eyebrows shot up, she didn't know what she was expecting, but a gift, definitely, was not on the list.

     "Should I be scared?" She eyed the box suspiciously, half expecting it to contain a cockroach or spider.

     "Just open it, don't be a brat." He shoved it into her hands, and Clarke took some comfort in him acting a little more normal.

     She pulled the top of the box off, slowly, and felt her heart skip a beat, a smile creeping onto her face. Inside was a necklace, a small silver pendant shaped like an atom hung on a cheap chain with 'Nerd' stamped on the front.

     "Thanks for helping me study." Bellamy shifted his weight from one leg to the other uncomfortably, but seemed pleased with Clarke's reaction.

     Clarke let out a single laugh, and bit her bottom lip. She looked up at Bellamy, and the shine in her eyes could have blinded him.

     "This is so sweet, Bellamy. I don't know what to say." Bellamy laughed nervously and rubbed the back of his neck with a shrug. "I didn't know you had it in you." Clarke was all but beaming now, and it seemed the happier she got the harder it was for Bellamy to look her in the eye. Clarke knew it was a cheap novelty gift, but it felt like diamonds in her hands, it was a token of something more.

     "I'm not all bad, Princess."

     "Thank you." She touched his hand, and his eyes met hers, locking.

     He opened his mouth to speak, but seemed to think better of it. "We should get back," he whispered finally. "Wouldn't want anyone to get suspicious." His voice sounded almost sad as he opened the door. For a moment, Clarke wished that they could stay in that room, because as soon as they walked out, the spell of the moment would be broken, and they would have to go back to hating each other. Bellamy looked into her eyes one last time before stepping out, and she could almost see him thinking the same exact thing.

     "You're right, you know." She called after him as he started walking away, just quietly enough that the crowd in the other room wouldn't hear. He turned and gave her a curious look. "You're not all bad." Bellamy almost smiled. "There might just be a soul in there somewhere." At that, Bellamy's face broke out into a real smile, and he got a mischievous glint in his eyes.

     "Be careful, you wouldn't want anyone else hearing you say that. Besides," he smoothed his jacket, "I have a certain reputation to uphold." He winked at her, and turned to leave again before turning back once more. "And don't go getting used to this, Princess. It was just some sort of Christmas miracle, once in a lifetime sort of thing." Clarke rolled her eyes, but the smile on her lips betrayed her. She clutched the small pendant in her hand as he retreated down the hall and back to the party.

     At the end of the night, everyone said their farewells, and Finn proposed that she go back to his room for the night. Clarke declined with some pathetic excuse as she rolled the small pendent around in her palm. She knew it would be their last night together for a few weeks, but for some reason she just couldn't bring herself to go with him. Instead, she promised to have breakfast with him before leaving in the morning, and headed back to her own dorm.

 

\----------------------------------------------

 

     A short three weeks later, Clarke returned to her school feeling refreshed. Her break was mostly uneventful, full of family parties and drunk aunts. Her mom had a new boyfriend, Marcus Kane, he was some political advisor for the mayor of her hometown. He seemed alright, and her mom seemed happy. She and Finn had talked most days over the phone, he seemed to be having a little more fun than Clarke catching up with all of his crazy high school friends. It seemed like there were always voices and laughter in the background of their phone calls, Clarke wished she could have been there with him instead of dodging her nosey relatives.

     But now she was back at school, and she had to admit she was a little relieved. She had come back a full week before classes started so that she could relax without being constantly bombarded from all directions, and she did get a few days of peace and quiet before everyone else started trickling in.

     On Thursday, Octavia showed up at her door, bursting to share every detail of her vacation with Clarke. They laid on Clarke's bed and laughed over their crazy families and lame gifts. Clarke had received 3 hideous Christmas sweaters and a handful of knitted scarves that she had no intention of ever wearing. At the mention of hideous clothes, Octavia started giving Clarke a list of gross ties that Bellamy had received and Clarke couldn't help but imagine him trying to be suave in bright green tie with the Tasmanian Devil tangled in Christmas lights and couldn't help but laugh.

     "Speaking of lame gifts, where did you get that?" Octavia laughed and fingered the silver, atom shaped necklace Clarke had hanging around her neck. "That looks like something you get out of a vending machine." Octavia teased and Clarke reached up to stroke the cold silver, feeling the grooves under her fingers, and felt herself smile.

     "I don't know, I like it. It’s cute." She lifted it up to look at, and tried to fight the stupid grin that had appeared on her face.

     "Oh." Octavia said knowingly. "Did Finn give it to you?" She wiggled an eyebrow suggestively, and Clarke felt a bit of color raise in her cheeks. Clarke imagined Octavia's reaction to knowing about the strange moment she had shared with the girl’s older brother, and decided against sharing. Octavia wouldn't understand, Clarke wasn't even sure she understood.

     "No." Clarke said quietly. "It was just a-it was just this stupid thing. I don't even know why I'm wearing it." Clarke shook her head and removed the necklace.

     Octavia eyed her friend suspiciously. "You know, if you have a guy on the side you have to tell me, that's like friend code." Octavia's voice held no judgment, but there was a definite interest in any juicy details that Clarke might produce.

     "No! Nothing like that!" Clarke laughed at the idea. "Oh god, no!" She protested further, picturing Bellamy.

     "Then why are you being so evasive?" Octavia accused. "You're hiding something." Octavia squinted at her friend.

     "I'm not!" Clarke protested and then looked down at the necklace in her hand then back up at Octavia, who just stared at her with raised eyebrows. "It was just... I feel like if I tell anyone about it, it will be demean the moment. Like it only means something if it stays between me and him." Clarke laughed at the idea, which sounded lame, even to her.

     "So you admit there is a boy?"

     "Not in the way you are thinking though!" Which was technically true, Clarke told herself.

     "Whatever, Clarke. Have your weird secret moments." Octavia gave up with a roll of her eyes. "But, just remember, Finn is a great guy who treats you amazingly. So before you do anything stupid, think about that."

     "I swear it was nothing like that! I did not cheat on Finn! I love him, I would never do that. You should know me better than that!"

     "I would like to believe that, but the way you are talking...It's suspicious. You know that, right?"

     "I know, it's just complicated. I'm not even sure I understand it, how am I supposed to try and explain it to someone else. Don't worry though, I'm would never do anything to jeopardize what Finn and I have."

     "Well, if you ever figure it out, I expect you to tell me." Octavia settled her head in Clarke's lap, and Clarke absent mindedly stroked the girl’s hair.

     "I think I'd rather not look into it too deeply." Clarke admitted. "Like I said, the moment is fragile, it needs to be examined from a distance and just taken at face value."

     "Whatever you say," Octavia said, her tone told Clarke that she had no idea what she was talking about.

     "How is Lincoln? When does he get back?" Clarke was eager to change the subject.

     "He should be getting back on Saturday." Octavia replied absently, and then sat up abruptly after a moment and glared at her friend.  "Did you tell Bell about Lincoln?"

     "What? No!" Clarke lied. That weasel had better not told Octavia about her slip. "Why? Did he say something?"

     Octavia looked at Clarke as if making her mind up whether she should believe her or not. "He said one of the other guys saw us together and told him, but I think he was lying."

     "Well, you two weren't exactly being sneaky about it." Clarke pointed out. "I mean Bellamy, himself, saw you two together, and Lincoln might have lost a tooth or two for it."

     "Yeah, but I flirted with guys all the time before Linc, and Bell never thought any of them were my boyfriends." Octavia countered, and Clarke had to admit it was a valid point. Bellamy hadn't even thought the guy was her boyfriend, and he had seen them making out first hand.

     "Well, I think every time he thinks about you having a boyfriend, he ages five years, so without anyone telling him he would prefer to remain oblivious." Octavia laughed at Clarke's statement. It was true though, Clarke sometimes worried he would have an aneurysm every time he saw Octavia standing too close to a guy.

     "Well, I would prefer if he was oblivious from a distance." Octavia groaned, "He always has to stick his nose in it."

     "Don't I know it?" Clarke complained. "Did I tell you, at the last party, Finn and I went upstairs, and your idiot brother had the nerve to come up and interrupt us just to say that we needed to go back downstairs!? Like, who the hell does he think he is? He runs off with girls all the time, but if I want some alone time with my boyfriend he has to butt in! I was about ready to bash his face in." Clarke complained, and Octavia laughed at the image of her brother walking in Clarke and Finn.

     Octavia rolled onto her back so she was looking up at Clarke with a sly smile on her face. "That's all for you, Clarke. Something about you just makes him go a little crazy. He would do anything if it got a reaction out of you."

     "Can't he find someone else to torture?" Clarke realized she was squeezing the necklace so hard that the end had started digging into her palm, so she put it back on before she ended up drawing blood.

     "I don't know, he seems pretty happy torturing you." Something in Octavia's voice made Clarke want to change the subject.

     "Who's torturing who?" A deep voice came from the doorway. They had left the door open since there weren't very many other girls back yet, Clarke now regretted that decision as Bellamy, himself, stood leaning against the frame.

     "Speak of the devil, and he shall appear." Octavia grinned at Clarke and sat up. Bellamy squinted at them suspiciously, his eyes fell to Clarke's chest, and he raised a subtle eyebrow at the necklace.

     Clarke frowned. "Don't you know how to knock?" Clarke scolded the older boy.

     "You left the door open." He smirked, and gestured to the wide open door.

     "It wasn't meant as an invitation." Clarke's glare deepened. "I know it isn't lack of good parenting, because Octavia has perfectly fine manners."

     Bellamy scoffed. "Is that a joke? Have you seen O's manners? She's like an ape." He skillfully dodged the pillow lodged at him by his indignant sister.

     "Fuck you, Bell. What do you want?" Octavia asked, annoyed.

     "See what I mean?" Bellamy looked incredulously between his sister and Clarke. "I was looking for you, my sweet baby sister." He flashed an innocent smile at Octavia who rolled her eyes. "I figured here was a good bet, and I was right."

     "And?" Octavia made an impatient face. "What do you want?"

     "I was going to see if you wanted to catch dinner with me? The Arc is having a half-off pizza and beer deal for the students who got back early." Bellamy drummed his fingers on the door frame as he spoke. The Arc was a brewery near the college that the students all frequented. 

     "Seriously? You had to hunt me down to ask that? You could have just texted me."

     "Yes, but it's harder to say no to someone in person. So..." Bellamy shrugged.

     "I don't know Bell, you are pretty damn easy to say 'no' to." Octavia said in an innocent voice, and gave a playful look before hopping up from the bed. "I'll go if you pay." She added, picking up her bag, then stopped and looked at Clarke. "Is Clarke invited? Or will you guys rip each other’s throats out before being able to have a civil meal together?"

     Bellamy frowned. "I don't think she wants to come." He stated bluntly without even looking at the blonde.

     "How would you know if you never asked her?" Octavia turned to gaze back at Clarke, expectantly.

     "Uh, I, uh..." Clarke stammered, trying to gauge the danger of a dinner with Bellamy. "I'm good. I'll just hang out here. I should get some reading done before classes start." She backed out.

     "God, you are such a nerd, Princess!" Bellamy exclaimed. "You are going to turn down free pizza for studying? Seriously?" He looked at her like she was some sort of alien being. "It's sad. I mean really. I knew you were lame, but this is an all-time low." He rambled on as Clarke sent him warning glares.

     "Come on, Clarke, it will be fun." Octavia urged, but when that didn't work, she tried a different approach. "Please don't make me go alone, I have been trapped in the car with him for 10 hours today, and I might kill him if I go alone."

     "That's exactly what he needs, two women who want to kill him at dinner together." Both of the Blake's frowned at her, and their features matched so closely that she could see the relation. "God! Fine! I'll go!" She cried, and stood up.

     Octavia bounced ahead in excitement. "Nice necklace." Bellamy whispered as Clarke walked past him, he winked at her glare, and gave a smug smirk before following his sister down the hall. This was going to be long night.

     The Arc was more crowded than Clarke had expected, she hadn't thought that many people were back yet. Apparently, she had been wrong. The brewery was not that spacious to begin with, but Clarke was certain it was not made to hold this many people. Every stool along the bar was filled, along with all of the booths and tables. A small group in the far corner called out to Bellamy and Octavia, beckoning them over to join. Clarke recognized a couple of them from Bellamy's house, Jasper and Monty were their names, and from what she had seen they were pretty inseparable. The other two, Clarke didn't recognize.

     They all squeezed into the corner booth, not leaving much elbow room for anyone. Clarke placed herself at the end so she could have a little bit of breathing room, and as a consequence found herself hip to hip with Bellamy, since Octavia wanted to sit next to Jasper. Everyone immediately started talking and swapping stories from break. Clarke found herself mostly listening without much to contribute. She wasn't a huge fan of large groups, she somehow always ended up the seventh wheel and feeling awkward. So, instead, she sipped her beer and listened to people who had more exciting lives than her.

     At one point, in an attempt to make the space less cramped, Bellamy had strung his arm over the back of the seat and consequently around Clarke's shoulders. Clarke had to make a conscious effort not to lean into him, though they were close enough it would only be about an inch of movement for her to close the gap between her shoulder and his side. She could feel the rumble of his chest every time he laughed.

     Octavia was so absorbed in her conversation with Jasper and Monty that she hardly seemed to remember that Clarke was there, but Bellamy would glance at her out of the corner of his eye every so often, silently prodding her to join in on the conversation. He even tried prompting her with a question every now and then, but she kept her answers short and then backed out again.

     "I feel like you're not having fun." Bellamy leaned in and whispered in her ear, his breath brushing her hair. Octavia gave them a funny look from across the table.

     "It's getting late." Clarke responded loudly, also speaking to Octavia. "I should get going." She offered a polite smile, and stood from her place at the table.

     "I should walk you back," Bellamy offered, and stood with her. Everyone at the table immediately shifted to a more comfortable distance from everyone else with a collective sigh of relief.

     "Oh no, it's alright." Clarke protested. "I'll be fine. You stay with everyone."

     "You shouldn't be walking alone at night. I'm going with you." He pulled on his coat, and shot Clarke a no arguing face. Clarke nodded in defeat. "O," he turned back to the table, "I want you to call me or text me as soon as you are back in your room. And don't walk back alone, Jas, you go with her." Jasper nodded dutifully, and Octavia rolled her eyes but agreed. Bellamy handed his sister a couple bills to pay for the food and drinks when they were done, and then followed Clarke towards the door.

     They walked out into the night, leaving the warmth of the brewery behind them. A light snow was beginning to dust the ground. Clarke pulled her coat tighter around her to ward off the chill. The silence was broken only by the crunch of fresh snow under their shoes as they walked, and the distant sound of cars passing on the next major road.

     "You were awfully quiet tonight, Princess." Bellamy pointed out, his breath coming out in small puffs of fog.

     "Yeah," Clarke kicked a pine cone off of the sidewalk and frowned. "I'm not very good in group settings.”

     "Oh really? Then I'd say a sorority is exactly where you belong." Sarcasm dripped in his voice, and Clarke let out a cynical laugh.

     "You have no idea." She could feel Bellamy watching her as they walked. "I really don't know how they do it, stay so preppy all of the time, and jump from one social event to the next without time to fully recover. God, and then the way they all look at me." Clarke threw her head back in frustration at the thought. "It's like they are all just waiting for me say something amazing, and turn every event from good to amazing like my mom did." She felt the snowflakes land on her cheeks and nose, which were almost completely numb by then. "It makes me want to scream sometimes. Especially when they give me those disappointed looks after I've come up with nothing. Your sister is the only thing that keeps me sane in that house. I might have gone postal by now, if it wasn't for her." Bellamy continued watching her, not saying anything. "You know, you get the same look on your face as your sister when you have no idea what I'm talking about." Clarke laughed at the resemblance, before growing serious again. "She's the closest thing I have to someone who understands me right now, and even she doesn't get it. Not completely. I mean she has the whole cynical sarcastic thing down, but she still lives for the parties and social events. And, I mean, Finn humors me when I tease and complain, but I can tell he still has dreams of that Barbie doll wife, and I know that's something I will never be. And they are the only two people I have on my life right now who I can talk to." Clarke wasn't sure why she was telling Bellamy this, but it felt good.

     "That's not true." Bellamy spoke up. "You have me." He seemed unsure of the words as he said them.

     Clarke let out a loud laugh at idea, but stopped when she looked back at Bellamy's face. "Oh, you were serious?" She stared at him, trying to figure out what was happening, and decided that he was, in fact, serious. "Sorry, I just never really considered you as someone to talk to like that. That's not really the kind of relationship we have." She frowned. She wasn't quite sure what kind of relationship they did have.

     "You're talking to me now." He paused. "But I guess you're right. We're better at fighting than listening."  He nudged her playfully with an elbow as they stepped into her building.

     "Yeah." Clarke agreed, avoiding his eyes. Something in the statement just seemed sad. "Well, I think I've got it from here." Her room was just down the hall, and she was a little eager to get away from the uncomfortable feeling that had fallen over the two of them. "Thanks." For walking her back. For buying her dinner. For listening even though he didn't have to.

     "Anytime, Princess." He smiled down at her, and tipped an imaginary hat before walking back out into the cold. She watched him until he was out of sight before heading to her own room. The tides were shifting, and Clarke wasn't sure she was ready for where they were taking her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is a BIG one! So, stay tuned ;)


	4. The Break

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry this came out so much later than normal. I have been at a conference all week and it has been sucking all of my time. The next one will be up on in the normal 2-3 days. Thank you!

      Finn got back that Friday, and Clarke and he had spent most of the weekend catching up, in more than one way. Lucky for Clarke, her dorm mate wasn't getting back until a few days into classes because her brother was getting married. Clarke didn't see Octavia or her brother again until classes started, and then everything fell back into a familiar pattern, just with different teachers. The first two weeks flew by, and before Clarke knew it, it was Finn's birthday.

     He and Clarke had made plans to spend the day downtown and catch dinner at Finn's favorite restaurant in the area, but that morning Clarke received a message on her phone from Finn telling her that he wasn't feeling well and needed to cancel their plans. He had apologized profusely in the message, but he did not want to get her sick as well and they could celebrate when he was feeling better. Clarke frowned at her phone as the message ended, she had made some pretty big plans for the day, and now poor Finn had to spend his birthday sick and alone. No. Clarke decided that was unacceptable. She was going to be a good girlfriend and take care of him, spend the day with him. That might, at least, or at least try to make it a little less miserable.

     She got to the house just as Bellamy was walking out with some trash bags to throw away. His eyes widened as soon as he saw her, and he dropped the bags where he stood, rushing towards her.

     "What you doing here? You shouldn't be here. You need to go." His tone was hushed and hurried as he grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her away from the front steps.

     "What the hell, Bellamy?" She called and pulled herself out of his strong grip. "I'm going up to help Finn. What the is your problem?"

     "No!" He cried, and pulled her back again. Clarke could see a war raging behind his concerned eyes as he struggled with what to tell her. "Finn does not need your help right now. Clarke, I need you to listen, I need you to trust me. Do not go in there. Just turn around and go home. You don't want this." Clarke was so taken aback by his use of her real name that she almost didn't hear the rest.

     "Bellamy," she backed away slowly, growing more and more worried at the seriousness in Bellamy's eyes, "you're freaking me out." Something was very wrong.

     "Please, Clarke, go home." He was pleading with her, it was in his voice and shone through his eyes.

     "No." Her voice came out as a whisper. "Get out of my way." She pushed past him and into the house. She could hear him call after her, telling her to stop, begging her to stop.

     The inside of the house seemed quite, Jasper and Monty were sitting on the couch playing some war based video game and they both froze upon seeing her, their faces falling. Something was definitely very wrong. Before anyone could speak, a beautiful brunette came around the corner laughing to someone behind her.

     "Oh hi," she extended a hand to Clarke as she introduced herself. "I'm Raven, Finn's girlfriend." Clarke felt her heart stop in her chest and took an unconscious step backwards.

     Right behind Raven, Finn came around the corner and froze, his face falling in broken horror. Clarke looked between the two, she knew her mouth was hanging open, but she didn't seem to have control over her body at the moment. She could feel that Bellamy was standing behind her, ready to jump in if needed, she could feel Jasper and Monty waiting for the explosion, she could see Finn trying to speak to her with his eyes, she could feel Raven waiting for her speak. It was probably only a second, but Clarke felt like she stood there for an eternity, her brain slowing time so that she could process what was happening. Finn's girlfriend. She was looking at Clarke with the eyes of an oblivious angel.

     “I’m sorry, his what?” Maybe she had heard her wrong. Clarke prayed she heard her wrong.

     “Finn’s girlfriend. I came into to town to surprise him for his birthday. I know, it’s crazy, driving all of this way, but I thought ‘What the hell? Why not make a weekend of it?’” She paused as she saw Clarke’s face and realized that she wasn’t listening. “Are you alright?” Raven asked, a little wary, and looked between the guys in the room to see if this was normal behavior.

     "Sorry, I'm Clarke." She answered slowly, drawing each word out to buy more time for her brain to kick back into gear. "Sorry, I think I'm still a little drunk from last night." Clarke tried to explain her delayed reaction with a lie to Raven, who was looking at her like she might be a little dense. Clarke shook her head slightly to try and clear some of the fog building up in her brain, and looked back at Bellamy with a bit of desperation. Of course he would be there to watch her fall apart, he was probably waiting for it. Both he and Finn were looking at her with confused faces, they knew she hadn't been drinking, and this was not the reaction either of them had been expecting. "I just," She tried to force her brain to work, to make her mouth form words instead of the sob that she could feel rising in her chest. She needed to leave. "I think I left something here last night, I was just…just getting it." She knew they were all waiting, expecting her to attack Finn or start breaking down, but she knew if that happened it would mean breaking Raven's heart too, and she couldn't do it. She couldn't stand to see those doe eyes turn sad. Not because of her. 

     "Yes," she heard Bellamy pipe in a little too hastily, clearing his throat as he recomposed himself and came to her rescue. "Your jacket, it's in my room." She felt his hand touch her arm lightly, and she jumped as if coming out of a trance. She felt her chest tighten further, and water began to blur her vision. She turned to Bellamy before the pair in front of her could see anything, and let Bellamy lead her up the staircase. She couldn't remember there ever being so many stairs, but his hand guided her on her lower back up the neverending flight providing her with an anchor. His touch was so light she could barely feel it, whether it was because he was afraid she might shatter beneath him or because she had gone completely numb, she couldn't tell. 

     "Wow, Princess, you handled that-" He started, sounding impressed as soon as the door to his room clicked shut.

     "Finn has a girlfriend." Clarke interrupted him in a stunned whisper as if Bellamy hadn't said anything at all. She ran a hand through her blonde waves as she plopped ungracefully down onto the edge of Bellamy's bed, never looking anywhere but straight ahead. "Finn has a girlfriend." She repeated, her voice remaining even and distant, as if she were trying to memorize vocabulary for a test. 

     Bellamy swallowed hard from where he stood by the door, unsure of what to do. "Ok, maybe not so well. Clarke...?" He said her name wearily.

     This felt too much like the calm before the storm, and he wasn't entirely sure he knew how to handle things once the storm cloud finally broke. Maybe it had been a mistake to take her to his room. Her head snapped towards Bellamy at the sound of her name and Bellamy saw something crack inside of her.  _Finn had a girlfriend._

     "Oh god, I'm so stupid." She felt her voice crack as she spoke and tears threatened to spill, but she blinked them away. She wouldn't cry in front of Bellamy. "How could I be so stupid? There had to have been signs and I'm just too stupid..." She began rambling and Bellamy found himself seated on the bed next to her, pulling her into his shoulder, acting on pure instinct.

     "No," He whispered into her hair as she trembled in his arms, fighting every urge to scream and cry. "No. You’re not stupid. You had no way of seeing this coming. We were all surprised, he fooled everyone." Bellamy murmured.

     Clarke pushed away abruptly and stared him, anger burning behind her still watery eyes. "You." She pushed away and stood up abruptly. Bellamy found himself standing with her, in self-defense more than anything. "You knew." She jabbed an accusing finger into his chest. "You knew and you were just going to let me continue playing the fool! You told me to walk away and you weren't going to say anything!" She landed a hard shove on his chest and Bellamy caught her wrists, holding her still and looking deep into her eyes.

     "I wanted to tell you. I need you to know that. I wish I was strong enough to tell you, but I knew it would hurt you and I just-I just couldn't bring myself to say it. I felt like I needed to protect you from it. To shield you."

     "How long? How long have you known?" The anger drained from her face and she just looked exhausted and broken. Bellamy had to look away.

     "I just found out last night when she arrived." He said, his brow holding a crease.

     "Last night?" Clarke winced at the implication of the statement. They had spent the night together. She sat back on the bed, and put her head in her hands.  "So I guess the hope that he was planning on breaking up with her and just hadn't gotten around to it is a bit vain, isn't it?" She let out a humorless laugh and fell back on the bed so that she was looking at the ceiling. Bellamy had a crude painting of the night sky spread across his ceiling and Clarke lost herself in it for a moment, the side of the room where the sun would hit every morning was beginning to fade, it must have been there for years. "What do I do? That girl... She deserves to know. But I don't want to be the one to hurt her like that. She doesn't deserve this." Clarke said to the air, Bellamy answered with a sad chuckle that caused Clarke to look at him confused. He had laid down next to her at some point and Clarke stared at his ear as he spoke.

     "You really are something Princess." He looked at her then. "Most people would be saying poor me, but not you." He gave a sad, lopsided smile. "You're more worried about her." He paused, lifted a hand, but then seemed to think better of it, and let it drop. "You're not the one hurting her Princess, this is Finn's fault."

     "Then why do I feel so guilty? I should have seen a sign, I should have known." Clarke felt a stray tear slip down her face and fall onto Bellamy's comforter.

     "You're not at fault here Clarke. Finn is. You need to understand that...I need you to understand that. Finn did this, he is only one who should be feeling any guilt and, god, I hope he feels like shit. I hope he wakes up every night and kicks himself because he had you, and he threw you away." Bellamy cupped her cheek in his hand brushed aside another stray tear with his thumb.

     "This hurts Bellamy." She whispered and he pulled her into him for a second time, using his body to block out the rest of the world.

     "If you ask me to Princess, I swear to god, I will go down there and rip his arms off." She pulled away slightly to look at him. "I swear it, I'll do it. Just say the word. Or don't say anything, wink, nod, blink three times, any sign." He prodded her with his elbow, his eyes darting back and forth between hers, a flicker of desperate humor in them. She let out a laugh that sounded more like a strangled sob then froze at the sound of a knock on the door. They both sat up abruptly and stared at the shut door. "That'll be him, now is your chance." He looked at Clarke before getting up to answer the door.

     "Bellamy, wait." Clarke whispered urgently just as Bellamy's fingers brushed the handle.

     "Don't worry Princess, I have your back." Bellamy winked at her before opening the door just enough to wedge his body into the space. Clarke turned so only the back of her head could be seen from the doorway.

     "Let me talk to her Bellamy." Finn's voice hit her ears like a slap to the face and she had to cover her mouth to keep a cry from escaping. She heard something solid collide with something else, most likely Bellamy's palm stopping Finn from pushing past him.

     "Something tells me the lady does not wish to speak to you at the moment." Bellamy's voice was flat as he spoke.

     "This is none of your business, Bellamy! Let me talk to her. Clarke!" He called to her over Bellamy's shoulder, and she had to fight the urge to turn to him.

     "I'm making it my business, Collins, now I think you should leave." Bellamy's voiced came through clenched teeth and Clarke could feel Finn's hesitation.

     "Clarke, please. Let me explain. Please. Clarke!" Finn called as she heard Bellamy muscle him away from the doorway, and Clarke turned around just in time to catch Finn's eye as the door was closing on him. His eyes pleaded with her as the door slammed in his face.  

     "I have to go." Clarke stood and Bellamy nodded, a remorseful look on his face.

     "I'll walk you." He grabbed a coat that hung off the back of a chair near his desk.

     "No." Clarke put up a hand to stop him. "I think I want to be alone right now." She frowned. 

     "You're strong, Princess." He brushed a strand of hair out of her face with the back of his fingers. "Remember that."

     "Thank you, Bellamy." She blinked, took a deep breath, and pulled away heading for the door.

     "Wait."  He stopped her. "I should at least walk you to the door, so he doesn't ambush you or try to follow you." Clarke nodded and let Bellamy take the lead.

     Bellamy watched her as she retreated down the street and fished his phone out of his pocket once she was out of sight. She really shouldn't be alone right now.

 

B: Hey. Can you do me a favor?

O: What's up brosef?

B: Go check on Clarke. I think she needs you right now.

O: What did you do >:(

B: Not me. Finn. Go to her.

O: What happened?

B: Just do it.

 

     She didn't want him, but she should have someone there for her. And Octavia would know how to handle all of this much better than he did. Now, to spend the rest of the day sending pretty boy dirty looks. He began making a mental list of ways to make Finn's life a little harder. 

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------

 

     Octavia opened the door to Clarke's room slowly, with caution, unsure of what she was about to find. Her brother had not exactly given her a lot of information. The room was dark with only a sliver of light leaking in through the drawn curtains, and at first Octavia thought Clarke wasn't there. Then she heard it, a small muffled cry.

     "Clarke?" She flipped the light switch, and her heart almost stopped in her chest. Clarke sat curled on the floor between the desk and her bed, a pillow held against her body as an attempt to muffle her cries, tears streaking her face. "Oh, Clarke." Octavia rushed to her friend and took her hands in her own. "What happened?" Clarke's face contorted into another sob and she fell into her friend. "Clarke you need to breath." Octavia stroked her hair and tried taking deep breaths to show Clarke. "Oh, honey, I know a guy who can get me a gun and I will fuck someone up if I need to." Octavia threatened and Clarke sent her friend a scolding look as she tried to take in a deep shuddering breath. She was just like her brother sometimes. "Tell me what happened." She pulled her friends head back onto her shoulder.

     "Finn..." Clarke couldn't bring herself to say it again.

     "How does Bell know already, and I don’t!" Octavia said, frustrated. "You know I hate being the last to know."

     "I was the last to know. They all knew and no one said anything. They just left me to find out like that. I was just standing there like an idiot with everyone staring." Clarke started rambling between stuttered breaths and hiccups.

     "Woah, woah, Clarke. What are you talking about?"

     "Finn.... Finn has a girlfriend." She had said it a hundred times, but it was still as hard as the first time.

     Octavia fell silent for a moment. "I'm assuming you mean other than you." Octavia's lips formed a thin white line and she ground her teeth together. "I can't believe it, that jackass. I'm going to kill him." They sat in silence for a few minutes while Clarke cried into her friend. "He's the one who should be crying you know, he lost  _you_  and that is no small loss."

     "How am I supposed to face him again?" Clarke asked. "He is going to be at every social event, and god, if he tries to talk to me...I don't think I can do it."

     "You can do it, we'll make you super hot for tomorrow's party and he will rue the day he decided to two time you."

     "Oh god! Tomorrow!" Clarke cried. "That's too soon. I can't."

     "Shut up Clarke! Yes you can! You are stronger than this. Don't let him turn you into some sad sob story. You make him come groveling to you because you are strong and independent. You don't need him. Now buck up." Clarke stared in shocked silence at her friends chastising voice before nodding. Octavia was right. Clarke was better than this. "Now, today we will get ice cream and watch stupid sad movies all night, but tomorrow we forget that ass wipe."

     "Deal." Clarke gave her friend a watery smile.

     "Now go wash your face, we are going to the store."

     Octavia's phone buzzed in her pocket as Clarke left the room and she glanced at it to see a text from Bellamy.

 

B: She ok?

O: She will be.

 

     Octavia tapped her phone and squinted, he was being way more concerned than he should be. Girl tears were a sure sign for Bellamy to turn tail and run, why was he acting so interested, and more suspicious, so involved in this one? Something was up with her brother.

 

\------------------------------------------------------------

 

     Octavia had given Clarke exactly what she needed with a stern talk the day before. Clarke was not some weak, pathetic, little girl defined by her man. She had gotten her tears out, now it was time to stand strong and show the world what she was made of. Clarke walked into the party looking dynamite with her head held high, but felt her resolve immediately vanish as soon as she saw Finn cuddled on the couch with Raven tucked neatly into his side. Her breath hitched in her throat and a shot glass was thrust in her face.

     "I have a feeling you're going to need this, Princess." Bellamy's deep voice rumbled low in her ear. She looked at Bellamy and took the shot with shaking hands before taking a deep breath and recollecting herself. "You've got this." Bellamy whispered before vanishing into the crowd of people just as quickly as he had appeared.

     This was going to be a long night. She was going to need more than just one shot, she could feel the others watching her with a mixture of sympathy and apprehension of her being a ticking time bomb, but no one dared to approach her. All of this attention was making her sick. She took two more shots in quick succession. Octavia said she had to be there, she didn't say she had to be sober. Throughout the night, Clarke had become an expert at dodging Finn who had sought her out more than a few times. Luckily for Clarke, the masses of people offered endless distractions, and Clarke was always able to get away before Finn ever had a chance to get close enough to get in a word. After every almost encounter she found herself downing another drink to ease the vise tightening around her heart. She needed a distraction, she needed something to get Finn off of her mind completely, even if only for a little while. Clarke had a pretty good idea where she could find such a distraction.

     She ambled through the house, running a hand along the walls for support as the alcohol warmed her blood until she found her target. She took a moment to watch him as he laughed with a small group of boys from the frat, his dark curls bounced with every big laugh and his freckled, golden skin wrinkled around his eyes. As if sensing her stare, Bellamy looked in her direction and shot her a curious look, his eyebrow disappearing into his hair. She realized how she must look, she was probably a hot mess by now. He bid his friends farewell and headed over to where she was barely holding herself up against the wall.

     "You okay, Princess?" The corners of his mouth twitched in amusement at her obvious condition as he looked her over.

     "Bellamy." she savored the taste of his name on her tongue and levered away from the wall so that she was now leaning against him. "Just who I was looking for." He raised an eyebrow down at her and struggled to suppress an ever growing smirk.

     "Is that so?" He helped brace her by placing his hands on her hips. "How might I be of service to her highness?"

     "Simple." She whispered, he probably didn't even hear her over the noise around them, but that didn't stop her from she leaning in close until her lips were barely hovering over his. She was halted by two large hands on her shoulders. 

     "Woah, Clarke." He pushed her away to a more comfortable distance and his eyes searched hers with deep concern. "What do you think you're doing?" 

     Clarke frowned up at him. "Wow," she breathed and took a step backward, pain etched across her face. "That must be a first. Rejected by Bellamy Blake. Ouch." She let out a sardonic laugh.

     "Clarke, you are drunk and hurting-" He tried to reason with her, but she wouldn't hear it.

     "Isn't that usually you're only two criteria?" She said bitterly and had she been in a more stable state of mind she might have noticed him wince slightly at the words.

     "You don't know what you're doing, Clarke. You don't want this." He kept his voice calm and low, but his heart was pounding in his chest. For a moment, he was worried she would feel it through the thin material of his shirt. 

     She took a few more wobbly steps back and away from Bellamy before yelling, though her voice barely cut through the noise around them, "You don't know what I want! You put on this act like you give a shit, like you want to comfort me, but when I actually come to you seeking comfort you spit in my face. Am I really so undesirable?" She knew the people nearest to them were now staring at her as she had a minor breakdown. Bellamy stared at her with a mixture of pain, desperation, and apology swirling behind his dark eyes.

     "Clarke."

     She stumbled closer to him again and laid her palms against his chest. "I just want to stop hurting, I want to forget. For just a few minutes, let me forget." She steeled herself and put determination back in her voice putting a few steps between them again. "If you won't do it, I'll just find someone who will." She went to turn away from him, but stumbled as the room began to spin with her. A familiar embrace caught her around the middle and held her firmly against him. She couldn't stop herself from leaning into him.

     "Come on, Princess. Let's get you home." She sighed and let him usher her out of the house. Luckily, they weren't far from her dorm and the walk was short and silent with Bellamy doing most of the heavy lifting when it came to supporting and steering Clarke.

     "Why won't you sleep with me, Bell?" Her sleepy drunk voice floated up to his ears and he opened her dorm room for her. He had to stop himself from laughing out loud at the ridiculousness of the question, but couldn't hide his smile over her calling him Bell.

     "That's easy Princess. If I did, you would never forgive me for letting you, and you would never forgive yourself come morning." He paused for a beat before adding, "And Octavia would probably castrate me," in a thoughtful tone.

     "You don't care about that stuff with other girls." She slurred as he laid her down on the bed and slipped off her heels. He chose not to respond to this. Clarke let out a sloppy laugh. "What does it say about you when your nemesis cares more about your feelings than the guy supposedly loves you?" 

     Bellamy laughed to himself, but again decided silence was probably best, he didn't want to risk how much she would remember in the morning. "You should sleep." He whispered and stood, but was stopped by a small hand around his wrist.

     "Stay with me." He could see the hurt in her eyes and it made something somewhere inside of him twinge and strangle.

     "Clarke, we already talked about this...." He started.

     "No, not like that." She corrected. "Just stay." 

     He kicked off his shoes and laid down next to her, not being able to tear himself away from her, not when she needed him. He faced her and their legs entangled underneath the blankets, her blue eyes staring back into his. For the first time in Bellamy's life, he realized how intimate a moment could be and have there be nothing sexual about it, and something in that realization sent up red flags in his mind. But as he breathed in her scent, it suddenly didn't seem to matter so much.

     "I never imagined we would ever be in a position like this." Clarke smiled at Bellamy, but the gesture was anything but happy. "Why have you been so nice to me lately?"

     "I can stop if it bothers you, I really am much more comfortable in my role as douche bag." Bellamy teased and received a sleepy shove to the chest in response. "But if we are asking tough questions, can I ask you one?"

     "Shoot."

     "How are you handling this so well? You guys were practically ready to walk down the aisle together. Where is the breakdown? Where is the hysterical crying?"  

     "I don't know if I would call this ‘well’, getting drunk and trying to get you sleep with me wasn't exactly a high point for me." Clarke frowned and her eyes grew foggy. "I'm not as strong as you think I am, just because you don't see it, doesn't meant it didn't happen." She whispered.

     "I don't believe that for a second." He whispered back. "You're probably one of the strongest people I know. I don't know anyone who would even dare to go out this soon, let alone to a party you knew he would be at."

     "I couldn't even face him. He kept trying to talk to me and I couldn't do it, I just ran." The tears started rolling down her face before she could stop them and Bellamy reacted on impulse, pulling her into his chest. "I can't do it, Bell. I can't. God, I'm so scared that as soon as he says he's sorry I'm just going to fall back onto his arms. I miss him, but I hate him. I want to forget, but I know I can never forgive him. I feel like I'm drowning and I don't know how to save myself."

     "I know, Princess, but he's scum who doesn't deserve a second thought from you, let alone your tears. He's not worth any of this Clarke. It won't be easy, but you have to forget him and his sorry ass. Be mad at him, show him he isn't worth the dirt on your shoes, but don't let him break your heart. He isn't worth that much." The rumble of his chest against hers and the feel of his slow, steady breathing calmed her. She took a shaky breath of her own and clung to him. They stayed like that for a moment, in a silent comforting embrace, until Clarke spoke.

     "When did we become people who did this?" Her voice was tired and still a bit shaky as she asked.

     "I don't know." He answered simply and his arms tightened around her and his fingers began absentmindedly twirling her curls. He would really rather not think about how they got where they were at the moment, there were some doors he wasn't ready to open and explore.

     "I like it." Her voice was barely audible, almost completely muffled by the black material of his shirt. "It's different, and new, but it feels right.” He could still hear the alcohol in the cadence of her words as she drifted off. "You are good, Bellamy. I see you."

     "I'm not good, Princess." He murmured into her hair as her breathing evened out and he knew she was asleep. "But for you, sometimes I wish I was."         

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

     Bellamy blinked his eyes awake as the sun started creeping through the window. It took him a moment or two to realize that he was not in his own room, and then a moment more to remember where he actually was. He had intended to sneak out after she had fallen asleep, he must have dozed off himself. He looked over at the sleeping girl next to him and had to bite back a smile. She looked so peaceful laying there. Her eyes darted back and forth behind closed eyelids and there was a small crease on her brow. She must be dreaming. Her makeup from the night before was a little smeared around her eyes from a combination of tears and sleep. Part of him wondered how much she would remember from last night. Part of him wanted her not to remember anything and have the memory be his alone, but then the other part of him wanted her to remember him being there and comforting her.

     Either way, he should probably leave before she wakes up. He had a feeling it would somehow be ruined as soon as she opened her eyes. So, he laid a small kiss on her forehead before pulling on his shoes and sneaking out, but not before stealing one last glance at the sleeping princess before closing the door. He turned around and found himself face to face with an extremely angry looking Octavia and nearly jumped out of his skin. Shit.

     "Jesus, O. What the hell are you doing here?" He kept his voice down so as not to wake Clarke inside.

     "What am I doing here!? I'm checking on my friend." Octavia returned in an equally hushed voice that somehow managed to sound even scarier than her actually screaming at him. "What the fuck are you doing here? I cannot believe you! You took advantage of her! She is in pain and vulnerable and you just couldn't pass up the opportunity. You couldn't even keep it in your pants for my fucking best friend!" Bellamy wasn't sure he had ever seen his sister so mad at him before, and she didn't exactly have the mildest temper.

     "Woah! Woah!" Bellamy put his hand up in defense. "You are way off base, O. I didn't sleep with her." He paused. "Well technically I slept with her, but only in the most literal sense. There was no sex involved!" Octavia's glare didn't lessen at his words, she didn't seem to believe him.

     "Yeah right, I don't think you have ever shared a bed with a non-relative woman without your penis being involved." Octavia retorted and folded her arms angrily.

     "Okay, first of all O, I am not comfortable with you talking about...my genitals. That's just weird, please don't ever say that again." He and his sister talked about a lot of things, but that was just crossing a line somewhere. He got back on track after his sister nearly bore a hole through him with her glare. "Second of all, I swear I did not touch her like that."

     "But there was touching?" Octavia raised her eyebrows accusingly. 

     "I was comforting her! She asked me to stay, so I did. Hell! She even made a move on me and I turned her down! I feel like I'm getting punished for actually being a doing the right thing for once!"

     "If I find out you fucked her, I will personally make sure you never get to touch another girl again." Octavia threatened. It was not like her brother to comfort anyone, herself excluded, without sex as an end game. "I know you would have tried it with any other girl, why would I believe she is any different."

     Bellamy thought about it with a frown. It was true, he knew because he had tried it with countless girls in the past. and was usually successful. So why not Clarke? She had been ripe for the picking. Why had this been different? The answer was obvious. Because she was Clarke.

     "Oh my god." Octavia stared at her brother with wide eyes and a smile began to pull at the corners of her lips. "You actually like her!" She accused in an excited voice.

     "What? Don't be stupid O." He countered with a disgusted face. "I don't 'like' girls. I'm not some stupid schoolboy who gets dumb crushes."

     Octavia just shook her head and continued to smile, making Bellamy's frown deepen further. "You like her, even if you don't know it yet. Why else would you even care about comforting her or be worried if she's okay?"

     "You're crazy O, she's just..." a friend? What was she to him? "She is going to have a mad hangover when she wakes up, you should probably get in there and make sure she doesn't puke on herself." He huffed and pushed past his sister to leave. Octavia just watched him storm away with a knowing smile on her face. This was going to be good. Or terrible. Octavia frowned, knowing her brother it was probably the latter. She turned away and opened the door to an already groaning Clarke.  

 

\------------------------------------------------

 

     Clarke felt like she had been hit by a freight train when she woke up. She buried her face in her pillow in an attempt to escape the blinding light burning through her window. Who knew dying would be so painful? She jumped as a hand touched her shoulder tentatively.

     "Hey Clarke, how are you feeling." Octavia's voice whispered above her, Clarke thought her eardrums would burst as the voice echoed off the walls of her skull. She sent a deadly glare to her friend who tried to hide an amused look behind a fake grimace. "That bad?"

     "I think I'm dead." Clarke mumbled into her pillow. "I've died and this is hell."

     "That's about how you look, babe." Octavia scrunched her nose playfully and dodged a swipe from a disoriented Clarke. "Come on," Octavia motioned for her to get up. "Why don't you take a nice hot shower and I'll get you some coffee and some Advil?" 

     "Ugh, yes please." Clarke groaned and rolled out of bed, almost landing ungracefully onto the floor. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and frowned. Octavia hadn't been wrong when she had said that she looked as bad as she felt. Her makeup was smeared down her cheeks and all around her eyes, her hair was sticking out every which way, and her clothes where crumpled and crooked.

     "You better hope Bell didn't take a picture or something before he left, this would make great black mail." Octavia grinned at her friend’s obvious disgust for her state of being.

     Clarke's frown deepened and she turned to face her friend so fast that the room continued spinning for a second after she stopped and Clarke had to steady herself and suppress the urge to vomit.

     "Your brother was here?"

     It was Octavia's turn to frown. "Yeah," She said hesitantly. "He was leaving just as I showed up. I knew he was lying when he said nothing happened! I'm going to kick his ass!"

     Clarke pressed the heel of her hand to her forehead and tried to remember exactly what happened last night. "I remember propositioning him." Clarke gulped, oh god. "No wait, he turned me down! I remember that. But then why was he here..." Clarke pressed harder against her skull.

     "Hold up! You 'propositioned' my brother?" Octavia shot Clarke a 'what-the-fuck' face.

     "Yeah, I'm sorry." Clarke scrunched her nose at her friends accusing face. "I don't think you understand how much I had to drink last night, O, and I was looking for a distraction and he does have a bit of a reputation for that stuff."

     "And he turned you down?" Octavia's face switched to confusion. "That really doesn't sound like him." Clarke almost didn't hear her friend as it all came flooding back. "Why are you smiling like that?" Octavia's eyes were squinted in suspicion. Clarke touched her lips, she hadn't even realized she was smiling. "Did something happen or not? I'm so confused!'

     "Yeah," Clarke breathed, a smile still on her lips. "I mean, no." She corrected herself when she saw Octavia's eyes widen. "At least not like that."

     "Ok, one of you needs to give me a straight answer before I strangle both of you."

     "Nothing sexual happened." Clarke clarified. "We just talked... he listened. It was weird. He was actually really sweet..." Clarke remembered the feel of his arms holding her close, his breath in her hair.

"That definitely doesn't sound like him." Octavia whispered in a deadpan voice and made a mental note that she might actually be right about her brother's feelings. 

     "I know." Clarke laughed causing her to wince at the throbbing in her head. "He was probably pretty drunk himself though." She closed her eyes against the light that she had momentarily forgotten about.

     "Go take a shower before you pass out." Octavia ushered her friend out of the room and watched her stagger down the hall. She ran a hand through her hair and shook her head, pulling out her phone.

 

O: Getting Coffee. Meet me there.

B: Ok

 

     She tucked her phone back into her coat pocket and started for the door. The coffee shop they frequented was only a few blocks away and Octavia found her brother waiting for her at the door with three coffees in a cardboard cup holder when she arrived.

     "Where is the drunkard?" He raised an eyebrow and looked around.

     "Taking a shower. I'm taking it back to her."

     "And what am I doing here?" He asked with a suspicious grin.

     "I don't know exactly what happened last night, but it's pretty clear it affected both of you."

     Bellamy rolled his eyes. "You're still on this?"

     Octavia put her hand up to shut her brother up and continued talking. "I don't know what happened, but you need be careful." Bellamy's brow scrunched in question. "You need to be careful with her. She is vulnerable and you  _will_  hurt her. You can be friendly, I don't care. But don't try and be her rebound."

     "O..."

     "I'm serious Bell. You start talking sweet to her and she is going to fall for it, because she is looking for something to fall for and she just isn't ready for that."

     "I honestly think you are making something out of nothing. I'm not trying to seduce your friend. I'm not interested in Clarke like that. In fact, I actively stopped that from happening last night. She just needed someone, and I was there." 

     "That's what worries me. Maybe you need to be there for her a little less right now."    

     "I'm not just going to abandon her, O. That's ridiculous. I won't make any moves, but I'm not just walking away."

     "Why not?" Octavia's voice rose a little. "You've walked away from every other girl in your life who wasn't related to you, why not her?" Bellamy answered her with silence. He didn't know an answer to that that didn't scare him. "Exactly...you won't admit it, but she means something to you... and that is going to get her hurt if you play your usual games. If you are serious about it, be serious about it, but don't just fuck with her and then throw her away because you are afraid of feeling something real for once."  

     They stood in silence for a moment while he considered her words. "I'm not going to try anything, I promise. I mean, even if it were like that, I wouldn't try anything because I know myself and she deserves better than that."

     "You know, I think if you ever actually tried in a relationship you would surprise yourself. The thing that makes you an amazing brother is that you love so hard when you actually decide to let yourself love."

     "I think you're getting coffee for the perfect example of why love is a bad idea. Clarke tried it and see where it got her." He smirked playfully, shrugging off the serious tone that had fallen over them.

     Octavia rolled her eyes. "She needs someone to love her, Bell, not just a rebound. That's all I'm saying."

     "How about I decide what I need from now on?" Clarke's voice made both of the siblings jump and turn to see an annoyed Clarke with her arms crossed standing a few feet away.

     "Clarke! What are you doing here? I was going to bring it back to you." Octavia took the cup Bellamy was handing her and passed it to Clarke.

     "You were taking too long. I didn't like just sitting there." She glanced between the two guilty faces staring back at her. "I don't think either of you have to worry about me 'falling in love' anytime soon. As far as rebounds go, I don't see how that is any of your business, but I find it unlikely. Last night was just...a fluke." Her eyes met Bellamy's. "Thank you for realizing that and stopping me before I did anything I would regret, it was surprisingly decent of you. But you were right when you said I would just end up hating both of us." Bellamy nodded with a half-smile at her words, but dropped the grin when he saw the hard look Octavia was giving him.

     "Well, I should get going." Bellamy said after a moment of tense silence. "There is probably a lot of cleaning to done at the house." He handed his sister her coffee, nodded at Clarke, and turned back toward the house. 


	5. The Fall

     Bellamy had been right about the house needing help. He wasn’t exactly sure what had happened after he had left with Clarke, but it must have been something close to a tornado. Bellamy had a theory that the more people drank, the less they remembered how trashcans worked. Nobody else in the house would be awake for a few more hours, so he decided to just get started without them. He was in the middle of taking his third trash bag to the curb when he found himself cornered by a red-faced, fuming Finn.

     “I saw you leave with her last night.” Finn jabbed an accusing finger into Bellamy’s chest without so much as a greeting. “If I find out you touched her in any way-”

     “You’ll what? Go on, I dare you.” Bellamy took a step forward until he was towering over Finn, his chest almost touching the shorter boy's. He could see the younger boy’s bravado falter a little before regaining confidence. “You’ll have to explain to your precious little honey upstairs why you got the shit beat out of you, and something tells me she won’t like hearing about your extra-curricular activities this year.” He saw the threat hit home in Finn’s eyes and the younger boy backed down. “That’s what I thought.” He muttered, irritated, and pushed past Finn, heading toward the door again.

     “You stay away from Clarke.” Finn called after him, trying to sound brave.

     Bellamy turned on his heel with a deadly look in his eye. “No!” He found himself shouting. “How about  _you_ stay away from Clarke. I heard about you following her around the party last night even though she made it perfectly clear that she did not want to talk to you. If I ever hear about you pulling that shit again, I want you to remember that I actually know how to follow through with my threats!”

     “I will talk to her.” Finn said as if it weren’t even a question. “We will work this out. We'll be back to normal before you know it, and I don’t want you touching her in the meantime.”

     “I don’t think your apology really counts if you’re still boning the other girl.” Bellamy had barely finished the sentence when Finn’s fist made contact. He didn’t really remember swinging back, but the next thing he knew Finn was on the floor with blood gushing from his nose.

     Bellamy stormed through the small crowd that their little fight had gathered with a curse as he searched for an ice pack for his throbbing eye. He was just about to head back up to his room when he was stopped by the little fireball that seemed to be the cause of all the drama this past weekend.

     “What the hell is your problem?” Raven shouted up at him, she looked ready to fight him herself. “You can’t just go punching people for no reason!”

     Bellamy looked at her in disbelief. “Um, excuse me,” he gestured to his ice covered eye, “but he punched me first. And it was hardly without reason.”

     “Yeah, he told me. He tried to confront you about harassing some drunk girl last night and you took it too far.” Bellamy laughed out loud at that explanation and received a confused look in return.

     “Oh, is that what he said?” Bellamy asked incredulously. “That little shit just can’t stop lying, can he? Is it like a compulsion for him or something? Why don’t I go get that girl and you can hear her side of the story? I’m sure you would find it most educational.” He couldn’t remember the last time he had yelled so much before noon.

     “What are you talking about?” Raven stared up at him in confusion, her mouth pressed into a thin line.

     Bellamy shook his head with a cynical laugh. “You know what, this is not my problem.” He retreated into his room and closed the door in Raven’s face before she could get out any further questions.

     He had successfully managed to avoid relationship drama for a vast majority of his life, how was he all of a sudden in the middle of a mess that wasn’t even his own? His mind was suddenly flooded with the way that Clarke had looked at him the previous night, the way she had curled up against him as she fell asleep. He could almost hear O’s voice nagging him and frowned, pushing the thoughts from his mind. This whole thing was stupid. Maybe keeping a little distance wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

     He removed the ice from his eye to examine it in the reflection of his blank computer screen. The surrounding skin was already starting to purple and swell. He ground his teeth together and wished he had landed a few more blows on that little twerp. The kid might not look like much, but he landed one hell of a punch, Bellamy had to give him that. They were supposed to have a movie night with ZBT tonight. He groaned at the thought. Planning events at the beginning of the year was supposed to make things easier on Maya and him, not more complicated.

     It took Bellamy a couple hours to calm down and collect himself enough to go back out into the rest of the house. By then, most of the house had been restored to its usual state of cleanliness, which considering it was a bunch of men living together still wasn’t perfect. Most of the cleaning left was in the backyard and kitchen, and Bellamy decided he would leave that to others. He was done for today.

     It was just getting dark when Bellamy decided to wander over to the ZBT house. People wouldn’t start meandering in for another hour, but as president of the house it was his obligation to help set things up. The ZBT house had a much bigger backyard than the boy's house, so it was perfect for outdoor events like these. By the time they had finished setting up the projector and angling it  so that it threw the picture across the back of the white house perfectly, most of the people had arrived. He could smell the popcorn machine going on the patio. Around it there were tables set up with other various snacks and drinks. Almost all of the good spots on the lawn had already been taken by people’s blankets and lawn chairs. It looked like he would be stuck in the back once again.

     He wandered over to the makeshift concession stand and cracked open the first beer he saw just as Clarke and Octavia made their through the back door, giggling with their heads bent together. He quickly turned his back to them, hoping they wouldn’t notice him standing there. The last thing he wanted was to have to explain the shiner he had received earlier that morning.

     “Hey Bell!” He heard his sister’s cheerful voice call to him. He pretended not to hear, but the next thing he knew they were standing right behind him. “Hey Bell, you should sit with us.” His sister pulled his shoulder back to turn him and he saw both of their eyes widen.

     “Jesus, Bellamy! What happened?” Clarke exclaimed and reached up to grab his chin, turning his head so she could see his injury better.

     “Is the Princess worried about a lowly commoner? I feel truly honored.” He smirked and did a mocking bow. Clarke rolled her eyes and pushed his face away, suddenly unconcerned.

     Octavia tapped her friends shoulder and nodded toward the other side of the yard where Bellamy could see Finn with his nose taped up and an even nastier bruise than he himself was sporting. Bellamy smiled a little at his handiwork. The smile was immediately wiped away when Clarke turned back to face him.

     “Please tell me his nose is unrelated to your eye.” Clarke asked, incredulous. “Bellamy!” She shouted and smacked his chest when he gave her a noncommittal shrug in response.

     “Trust me Princess, he had it coming.” Bellamy rolled her shoulders back and his jaw flexed a little. 

     “Nice.” Octavia gave him an approving look and offered him a high five that only elicited another smack from Clarke.

     Behind Clarke, he could see Finn approaching them, looking determined. Bellamy could feel his blood heat up as he grabbed Clarke’s arm and pulled her behind him before Finn could get to them. She let out a yelp of protest until she saw what he was doing. What was he doing? He found himself asking. So much for staying out of it.

     “Get out of the way, Bellamy.” Finn’s voice was cold and determined.

     “Walk away.” Bellamy warned and made himself an unbreachable barricade for Clarke.

     “Would you mind your own goddamn business for five minutes? I need to talk to my girlfriend.” Finn’s tone clearly said he had not learned his lesson earlier. Bellamy was just about to counter, saying that Finn’s girlfriend was still waiting for him by his blanket, when Clarke’s voice came out from behind him strong and confident.

     “I am not your girlfriend.” She stepped out from behind Bellamy, touching his arm as she passed to tell him that it was alright. “You don’t get to call me that. Not anymore!” Her voice was threatening without ever being raised.

     “Clarke,” Finn said her name like it was breath of fresh air, he seemed completely oblivious to her hostile tone and posture. He moved forward to touch her, but she swatted his hand away.

     “Don’t touch me!” Bellamy was sure he could water in her eyes despite her seeming confident. “And I do not want to talk to you, you disgust me.” Finn flinched a little at her words, but seemed determined to continue.

     “If you’ll just come inside, if we could just talk for a minute, you’ll see. I love you, Clarke.” At that, even O looked ready to jump him.

     “How can you say that?” Clarke’s voice cracked as she spoke and both of her hands collided solidly with his chest. “How can you say that with your girlfriend sitting right there? What is wrong with you?” She was on the verge of shouting, but now that she had started she wasn’t about to stop. “She loves you.  _I_  loved you. We trusted you and you lied to both of us! You lied to  _me_! And now you’re lying to her! That poor girl deserves to know!” Tears were now streaming steadily down Clarke’s cheeks. The rest of the people in their proximity had fallen silent.

     “What is she talking about, Finn?” They all turned to see Raven standing a few feet behind Finn.

     “Raven.” He pleaded with her, but her stern look didn’t falter.

     “Everyone has been acting really weird toward me since I got here. If someone doesn’t tell me what the hell is going on right now…” Her demand was followed by a moment of silence.

     “He’s been cheating on you.” Clarke’s voice finally cut through, sounding weak and defeated. “I didn't know.” Bellamy found himself reaching out to Clarke, who looked like she was about to crumble to the floor. Raven blinked a few times at Clarke before casting her gaze to the floor. “If I had known, I swear-“ Clarke started again. but Raven cut her off with an upheld hand.

     “I believe you. This isn’t your fault.” She tried to give Clarke a look of understanding before she turned her gaze back to Finn and her face turned to stone. “How long?” Finn just shook his head in answer.

     “Since August.”  Clarke again. Raven’s already wide eyes widened.

     “August?” Raven almost choked on the word. “And it took three fucking days for someone to tell me?! What is wrong with you people?” With that, she stormed into the house, Finn fast on her heels trying to plead with her.

     Clarke had been clinging to Bellamy’s arm since he had offered it, and as soon as the other two disappeared he felt her knees go out and he had to reach out his other arm to catch her against him. “I need to get out of here.” Her voice came out as barely a whisper. He could feel everyone staring at them as she trembled in his arms.

     “Come on.” He whispered back and led her back into the house and away from the crowd, acutely aware of every pair of eyes that followed them, especially Octavia’s. He gestured to Maya to start the movie before he pulled them out of sight. He nudged her into one of the bedrooms on the bottom floor that didn’t look lived in. He sat her down on the stripped bed and knelt in front of her. “It’s okay, Clarke. They’re all gone. It’s just you and me.” He took her small, shaking hands into his bigger ones. “Do you want me to get O?” She just shook her head at him, staring at their joined hands. “You did the right thing, Princess.” Her eyes met his at the words.

     “Why is it always you that saves me?” Her eyes darted back and forth between his dark ones.

     “Just bad luck, I suppose.” He smiled weakly and broke eye contact to look down at their hands.

     “It’s just that out of everyone to help me…you don’t even like me.”

     “Now, Princess, I have never said that.” He laughed uncomfortably a little and squeezed her hands. She squinted at him, confused. Lights from the projector were shining through the thin curtains and throwing shadows around the room and across Clarke’s face as she stared at him.

     There was nothing that Bellamy wanted more in that moment than to just close the distance between them, he wanted to make her forget about Finn all together, to take away her pain. The thought shocked him almost as much as when she leaned forward, as if reading his mind. Her lips brushed his so lightly that, for a moment, he thought he had imagined it. He moved his hands up to her neck to still her and stared back into her big, blue eyes. She could see his hesitation and went to move forward again, but he stopped her.

     “Clarke,” he whispered her name, his voice full of gravel, and shook his head.

     “Don’t push me away again.” Her voice was just as quiet as his.

     “You said it was fluke.”

     “Please.”

     That one simple word coming from her sweet lips cracked something inside of him. He pulled her into him before his mind could tell him what a bad idea this was. Her hands clutched at his shirt, pulling him even closer until he was leaning over her on the mattress. He could feel his heart beating in his chest so loudly that he was a little worried she might be able to hear it. If she could, it didn’t stop her. Her hands were gliding over him with the same intensity that her lips held as they moved against his. He wanted to feel all of her, to taste all of her, all while remaining terrified that at any moment she would push him away.  Her hands found their way into hair as they found a rhythm for their bodies. His hands seemed happiest around her hips and up her back so that he could feel every movement that she made against him.

     “Oh my god!” A shout of disgust from the door made the pair pull apart. They both stared guiltily at Octavia who was glaring at both of them with crossed arms. “Are you kidding me?” He felt Clarke push him away gently, and they both made weak attempts  to straighten themselves out. He felt like a guilty teenager again, getting caught in the back of his truck or sneaking out of a girls house. “We talked about this. I thought I told you to keep your hands to yourself.” She scolded her brother and he had to keep from flinching.

     “It wasn’t his fault, Octavia.” Clarke chimed in, coming to his defense. “I started it.”

     “No, it is his fault. He knows exactly what he is doing. This is what he does, Clarke.” Bellamy ground his teeth together at his sisters pointed words. In any other case, she would have been right, but how could he say that?

     “It takes two, Octavia. He has turned me down enough times to earn his badge of honor, this is my choice now.” Clarke pressed.

     “Clarke, you’re too vulnerable to make these kinds of decisions.”

     “I’m not a child, O!” Clarke yelled back, clearly frustrated. “If I want to go and make a mistake, it’s my choice.” Bellamy clenched his jaw as her words hit home. something tightened in his chest. Octavia shot him a curious look that said she had seen through his failed attempt to veil his feelings. Clarke pushed past both of them and out of the room.

     “What do you want me to say, O?” He asked after a few moments of her just staring at him, he struggled to keep his voice even.

     “Do you have feelings for her? Be honest with me.” Octavia demanded.

     "I don't know!" That was the one thing he couldn’t bring himself to say. “I don’t know,” he repeated after a few moments, feeling defeated, “But I think she just made it pretty clear that was not something she was going for.”

     "I warned you she wasn't ready for anything like this. I just sort of figured that she would be the one getting hurt, not you." The anger in her face melting into sympathy. Octavia knew her brother well enough to know that an 'I don't know' when it came to feelings meant a lot more than that. She had only ever heard him laugh at the idea of caring about a girl he was hooking up with. 

     Bellamy rolled his eyes at his sister's look of concern and stepped past her. He told himself that he was not so far gone that he needed his sister's pity, that he didn't feel like he had just been punched in the gut. He could feel his sisters eyes on him as he retreated down the hall and into the backyard. He scanned the crowd, but found it void of a certain blonde head. A quick glance at the screen revealed Reese Witherspoon falling into the arms of the lead actor, and Bellamy felt his stomach turn. With a frown on his face, he turned and started back toward the Omega house. 

     As he approached the house, he could see Raven throwing her bags into the passenger seat of an old rust bucket truck that Bellamy could only assume was hers. Finn was nowhere to be seen. He was probably hiding up in his room pouting. Raven stopped to watch him as he climbed the front steps and entered the old house. He slammed his bedroom door shut and sloughed off his jacket, letting it fall to the ground by his feet. He was in the middle of pulling his shirt over his head when there was a sharp tap on his door. 

     Bellamy groaned. He was not exactly looking for company at the moment. He tugged his shirt back down and pulled the door open with a little more force than necessary. His annoyance was quickly replaced by surprise as he came face to face with a frowning, but determined looking, Raven. 

     "Can I help you?" He deadpanned. 

     "You're Bellamy, right?" She demanded. He nodded in answer. She continued, "I heard you have a reputation for helping a girl move on."

     "I'm not really in the business of mending broken hearts." He tried not to sound annoyed and impatient, but was not very successful. 

     "That's not what I'm asking for. I'm asking for an opportunity to get back at my cheating boyfriend." She answered with almost as much disinterest. "Now are you gonna let me in or what?"

     For the second time in Bellamy's life, he hesitated to bring a girl into his room. What was wrong with him? The past couple days had been as much of an emotional roller coaster for him as it had been for Raven, and honestly he could use a little distraction as well. Besides, Clarke had left his jeans feeling a little tighter than usual, so Bellamy stepped aside to let the fiery brunette in. If Clarke didn't need him, he would show her that he didn't need her either. 

 

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     After Clarke got back to her dorm room and paced the small space for a bit, she had worked herself up even more than she had been when she had stormed out of the ZBT house. Her brain was trying to fight a three front war, and she was losing. Her anger toward Finn for cheating on her was almost as strong as her anger with Octavia for thinking that she was too weak to choose for herself what she wanted, but none of this came even close to the feelings that her kiss with Bellamy had stirred up. She couldn't stop thinking about his lips on hers, his hands on her body, and his hot breath dancing across her skin. 

     Had she always felt this way and was just in denial? Was she just so desperate to find a distraction that she was fooling herself into thinking that the kiss was more than it had really been? How did Bellamy feel about the whole thing? Was she just an easy target or did he feel something? She couldn't erase the look on his face when she had left from her mind.

     She lay awake in bed that night mulling over these questions until she could see the first rays of sunlight peeking through her window. She had to talk to Bellamy about it. It was the only way to put her mind at ease. She got out of bed, threw a sweater over her pajamas, and quickly ran her fingers through her hair in the semidarkness of predawn, careful not to wake her sleeping roommate, before heading out toward the Omega house. 

     She didn't care that it was five in the morning, or that it was freezing outside and she was wearing nothing but shorts, a camisole, and an old sweater. She had to talk this through with Bellamy. This would be worth waking him up.

     The house door was always left unlocked because there were always hoards of people coming and going at all hours, so Clarke was able to sneak in quietly and make a beeline for the room upstairs at the end of the hall. She rapped on the door lightly three times. No answer. Three more times a little bit louder. She could hear rustling on the other side of door. 

     For the first time since leaving her dorm, Clarke started having second thoughts. Maybe this was a bad idea. She should have waited. As the door opened, all thought and doubts fled her mind. Bellamy stood before her in boxers with mused hair and sleep filled eyes. Clarke couldn't help but smile at the sight.

     His eyes grew wide and very awake upon seeing her. "Clarke? What are you doing here?" He used his body to block the door. "Do you have any idea what time it is? What the hell?" 

     "I know, I'm sorry. I just-I had to talk to you and I wanted to do it before I lost my nerve." Clarke tried to explain, but her brain was drawing a blank on how to breach the topic. Bellamy paled a little, and Clarke figured it was because he knew what was about to come next. Maybe she had been wrong.

     "This really isn't a good time, Clarke. Can we just talk about this later?" Bellamy shifted his weight in front of the doorway with a nervous flick of his eyes over his shoulder.

     She opened her mouth to insist when she heard a soft rustling in the room behind Bellamy. Her eyes shot to the small gap between Bellamy's arm and torso to see the bare back of a woman with an origami crane tattooed high on her left shoulder tangled in his sheets. Her heart stopped. Bellamy let a curse slip from under his breath. 

     "Clarke " he started, but stopped at the look on Clarke's face. 

     "You're right. I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking. I didn't realize-" She sounded shocked and dazed even to her own ears. She didn't know what she had been expecting, but it wasn't this. At least now she had her answer about his feelings and expectations.  

     "Clarke," he repeated helplessly.  

     "You know what, just forget it. This was stupid. I should go." She turned to leave, but was stopped by a hand around her bicep.

     She felt herself recoil from his touch, her heart twisted sharply in her chest. It was suddenly very hard to breathe. Why was she so surprised? After all, this was just like him. She looked back at him, silently begging him to have a good explanation, challenging him to prove her wrong. His eyes pleaded with her to understand, but his lips didn't move. It took a moment for Clarke to rebuild the strength to walk away from the silent war they were waging. She found herself in front of Octavia's dorm before the sun had risen above the tree line.

     "You better be dying," Octavia groaned as she pulled open the door in her pajamas. Her scowl faded when she saw the unshed tears in her friend's eyes. "Shit. What happened?" Octavia ushered Clarke into the room with a gentle hand. "I thought we were done with this? Did he do something else? Don't tell me you went back to him. Was it the girl? Did she do something? I will fight her!" Clarke shot her friend a look to shut her up, but it did make her smile a little to see Octavia so worked up in her defense.

     She blinked the water out of her eyes. There was no way in hell she was going to cry over Bellamy Blake, or over something that never even happened.

     "I don't really want to talk." She answered her friend's inquisitive gaze. "I just need you to be here." 

     "I can do that." Octavia smiled and together the two girls curled up in Octavia's bed to try and sleep away the rest of the morning. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for reading the story supporting me <3 You guys are great.


	6. The Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got such a wonderful response from you guys for the last chapter, thank you so much! I could not be more grateful for all of you.

      Clarke awoke a few hours later to a knee being violently thrust into her hip. This was exactly why Octavia and she never had sleep overs. Clarke groaned and kicked the girl back causing Octavia to snort awake, ever the epitome of grace. 

     "The fuck, Clarke?" The girl mumbled into her pillow and rolled over to continue sleeping. 

     Clarke had to stop herself from laughing. It felt good to want to laugh. Clarke slipped out of bed and escaped the room without further comment from Octavia. Clarke figured she had woken her friend up once that morning already. Octavia had never been a morning person, and it being Sunday would not help the situation. Clarke, however, was never one to sleep past 9 AM, no matter how late she had been out the night before or how little sleep she had gotten. 

     Octavia's room was just down the hall from Clarke's. She opened her door to sounds of her sleeping roommate and was careful not to make much noise as she got ready for her day. Considering she had only gotten a few hours of sleep last night and her head was still in turmoil over the events of the last few days, Clarke decided that she should treat herself to some coffee and a sweet breakfast. 

     She made a point to cross the street before passing the OKP house on her to the coffee shop. Why was everywhere they went past Greek Row? She could see Raven pulling away in her old truck and Bellamy standing by the curb, watching her go. Clarke put two and two together and figured out who the woman in Bellamy's bed was last night. Figures. It looked liked Raven and her had similar taste in mistakes. Clarke pulled up her hood and tried to duck her head and become small in hopes that he wouldn't notice her. 

     "Clarke!" Shit. She kept walking. She could hear his footsteps rush up to meet her, the snow from a few days ago crunched underneath his feet. She quickened her pace and debated falling into a flat out run. "Clarke, wait." He put a hand in her shoulder when he had finally caught up. She skillfully shrugged it away before it could make complete contact. 

     "I don't want to talk to you, Bellamy." She tried to sound void of emotion. 

     "I know. So let me talk." He started. "I just feel like I need to explain-" She cut him off. 

     "No, you really don't." Her feigned tone of apathy vanished and was replaced by pure malice. "I really don't care what you do or who you do it with."

     She could practically see his teeth grinding. "So you're telling me, you walked over to the house at 5 AM, in your pajamas, in the snow to tell me that you don't care what I do?" He asked incredulously. 

     "That was a mistake. All of yesterday was just one giant mistake. That is what I wanted you know." Clarke was struggling to keep from shouting. It was still pretty early on a Sunday morning, and people might not appreciate a full on screaming match in front of their houses. Bellamy kept silent, but maintained stride with her. "You know what the biggest mistake of yesterday was? Not listening to O. I can't believe I actually defended you to her when she was so spot on. You actually had me believing that it was all my idea, that that was actually something that I wanted and you were just trying to be a 'good guy'. What a bunch of bullshit. You were just looking for something to stick it in, as usual." At that, he grabbed Clarke's arm hard enough to make her stop walking and turn toward him. "Let go of me." Clarke warned in a low hiss and shoved him away with her free hand. 

     Just as he opened his mouth to speak a runner coming down the road stopped beside them. She was tall and slender with fierce proud eyes. Her long brown ponytail stuck to her neck with sweat and her high cheeks were red from running in the crisp air. 

     "Hey mister, I think you need to let go of her arm, right now." Her voice was practically dripping with authority. Bellamy and the girl held a short battle for dominance with their eyes before he let his hand fall away from Clarke. "Now walk away." The girl demanded. 

     Bellamy looked at Clarke again in one last desperate attempt to reason with her, but Clarke met his eyes with hard indifference and took a few steps back to create distance between them. The look on his face as she pushed him away was something close to wrecked.

     "I think you had better listen to her, Bellamy." It hurt to say it, especially after seeing Bellamy's frown at her words, but he managed to turn and leave without another word. She watched him walk back toward the house for a while before turning toward her savior. "Thanks."

     "Are you alright? I can call the cops if you want me to. I was a witness to him harassing you." The stranger pulled out her phone, but Clarke put out a hand to stop her. 

     "No, it's fine. He wasn't harassing me. It was just a fight. It's actually pretty normal for us." 

     The girl frowned. "Look, I know it's none of my business, but you shouldn't let your boyfriend treat you like that-" Clarke cut her off with a harsh laugh. 

     "No. He's not my boyfriend." Clarke shook her head. The girl really was quite beautiful. Maybe it wasn't too late for a distraction, one not as complicated at Bellamy. "I don't have a boyfriend. It's actually a pretty recent development, and one of the causes for the argument between Bellamy and me." 

     "He's not the ex, but you're fighting with him about the break up?" The girl raised an eyebrow, clearly confused. 

     "You make it sound kind of crazy, but yeah. It's all kind of complicated." Clarke replied sheepishly.

     "You could tell me about it over some coffee. I'm pretty much done with my run," the girl offered, and Clarke felt herself smile a little. 

     "I'm Clarke by the way." 

     "Lexa."

 

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     They walked together the rest of the way to the coffee shop where they talked for a few hours. Clarke learned that Lexa was a junior on campus, a political science major, and captain of the women's field hockey team. Somehow, Clarke ended up going back to Lexa's place after a few cups of coffee. 

     The next morning, Clarke lay in Lexa's bed thinking about the previous day. More than a few times, she had to banish Bellamy from those thoughts. No regrets, she told herself. This was where she wanted to be. Clarke had made it clear the previous day to Lexa that she wasn't ready for anything serious and that this was just physical, none of this seemed to deter Lexa at all. In fact, Lexa said that she was never much of an 'emotions' girl anyway, physical was always better. Yet, as good as yesterday had been, Clarke couldn't help but notice the way that her skin didn't tingle where Lexa touched her quite the way it had with Bellamy. At no point last night did Clarke find herself tempted to melt into her. 

     "Where the hell have you been?" Octavia ambushed Clarke as soon as she entered the dorms. "I have been looking everywhere for you. I called you like 50 times. I went to the house. Bellamy said he hadn't seen you since morning. Finn didn't know where you were. I was about to call the police! I thought Bell was gonna put a manhunt together himself by the time it got dark." Clarke grimaced apologetically, and tried to ignore the fact that Bellamy had been worried as well. 

     "Sorry. My phone died. I didn't think I would be gone that long." Clarke knew she had 'guilty' written all over face.

     Octavia blinked at her. "Where have you been for the past 24 hours?" There wasn't any accusation in Octavia's voice, but there was something that said she knew. 

     "I got...distracted?" Clarke tried. 

     "By?" Now Octavia was more curious than anything. 

     "I got in a fight with your brother again, and this girl was running by, and she kind of saved me, and then one thing led to another..." Clarke trailed off.

     "You slut!" Octavia beamed. "I'm so proud of you." Clarke felt her neck and ears grow warm. "Wait, what were you fighting with Bell over? You two seemed pretty cozy the other day. He didn't mention a fight yesterday when we were looking for you either." 

     "Yeah, you were right. I made a huge mistake kissing him at movie night. I realized that and found someone else to kiss instead, someone who won't manipulate me or make me want to punch their stupid, arrogant face in." Octavia looked thoughtful at her friends words. 

     "About that," Octavia started after a moment of silence, "I might have been wrong about that." It was Octavia's turn to look guilty. "I know it's not what you want to hear on your walk of shame back to your room, but I don't think he was using you."

     "Well, it's good to know I wasn't the only one that he fooled." Clarke responded without looking back at her friend. "But trust me, you were right. I went to talk to him later that night, and he had already found someone else to warm his bed by the time I got there." 

     "What? No. That's impossible." Octavia shook her head a little, a look of pure confusion on her face. 

     "Yeah. You can imagine my surprise." Clarke shrugged it off, "I'm just happy I found out before anything actually happened."

    "Wait," Octavia paused to think. "This fight wouldn't have anything to do with why you showed up at my door at five in the morning the other night, would it?"  

    "Don't be ridiculous, O." Clarke felt the color rise in her cheeks, which did not exactly help the look of indifference that she was trying to pull off.

    "If you have real feelings for my brother, you  _have_ to tell me." Octavia urged her friend, but Clarke just shook her head weakly. "No, Clarke, I need a real answer." There was an urgency in Octavia's eyes that made Clarke's heart skip in her chest. 

    Clarke opened her mouth, to say what, she hadn't quite figured out yet. Her mind flashed back the moment of seeing Raven in Bellamy's bed. "I think it was just this déjà vu moment of finding out that Raven got to the guy before I did, and him trying to hide it. I think it just reopened the wound, you know?" Clarke slumped down onto one of the couches in the dorms common area. This conversation was making it a little hard to breath. 

    "It was Raven?!" Octavia looked like she was about to internally combust as she plopped down next to Clarke. She ran a hand through her dark hair and stared at Clarke, astounded. "This makes no sense."

    "It makes perfect sense. It's just like you said, it's what he does. He sees a vulnerable woman and he just can't help himself." Clarke closed her eyes  and tried to focus on pulling air in and out of her lungs. On the backs of her eyelids, she could see Bellamy in that moment willing her to stay. His eyes had shown more than regret over losing the opportunity to hook up with Clarke. She shook the image from her head and snapped her eyes back open. Octavia was still watching her, Clarke could see the gears turning behind her friend's eyes. "Just let it go, O. We should just chalk this whole thing up to a moment of weakness on my side. It won't happen again." Clarke reassured her friend with a sad smile. Octavia nodded in response, but didn't seem convinced. 

 

\-----------------------------------------------

 

    Bellamy fiddled with his phone as he looked over the texts from his sister over the past week for the hundredth time. Octavia had refused to let him forget how much he had screwed up by sleeping with Raven. He had run into Clarke a few times on campus throughout the week only to be met with a stern, cold shoulder, not that he would have known what to say had she given him a chance to talk. One of the girls he had hooked up with last semester was rambling on in the background of Bellamy's thoughts, pulling his attention just about as much as the other miscellaneous noises from the party. 

    He was mad at Clarke. It had taken him a few days to realize it, but once he had allowed himself to consider how he felt about the situation it had come on like an avalanche. He had tried to distance himself from the situation. Ultimately, she had been the one to pull him into her riptide of emotions, and it had been Clarke that had ended up pushing him away. He wouldn't have gone with Raven if Clarke hadn't made him feel the way she had when she dismissed their connection. But, more than he was mad at Clarke, he was mad at himself. He was mad at himself for allowing himself to feel something for someone who was so inaccessible, and mad at himself for jumping ship at the first sign of doubt. He didn't want to feel as weak as she could make him feel sometimes. 

    He was pulled out of his daze by a blur of blonde curls rushing around the corner, panic plastered on her face. Bellamy tried hard to ignore her, but there was something about seeing Clarke so scared that triggered his fight instinct. He forced himself to remain rooted in his spot as blood and adrenaline flooded him brain. She had made it clear that she didn't need, or want, his help. She practically skidded to a halt a few feet past him and spun to face him. 

    "Bellamy," All it took was  that one shaky word to melt all of his resolve. He straightened away from the wall he was leaning against and took a tentative step toward her. "Bellamy. Bellamy. Bellamy." She repeated his name frantically over and over again as she reached for his arm. The girl who had been talking to Bellamy scoffed loudly and stormed away as Bellamy stepped closer to Clarke. He placed two big hands on her cheeks and stared into her large, scared eyes. He asked all of the right questions with his eyes. "It's Octavia. Something's wrong with Octavia." 

    Bellamy felt his heart come to a complete halt in his chest. "Where is she?" 

    Without a word, Clarke took his hand in hers and pulled him through the crowd and up the stairs. She stopped in front of Bellamy's room and gave the door a tentative push open. 

    "I didn't know where else to put her. I figured it would be safe in here." Bellamy pushed past Clarke and into the dark room before she could say anything else. 

    He knelt by the still form lying in his bed. Her breathing was shallow and a thin layer of sweat glistened on her forehead. He propped her head up, but received only a weak moan in response. "O? Open your eyes, O." He gave his sister a gentle shake,but she showed no reaction. "O!" He heard his voice waver in desperation and fear. "How much has she had to drink?" He asked Clarke over his shoulder. 

    "Not that much, we haven't even been here that long. She was fine a few minutes ago, I don't know what happened." Clarke wrung her hands and met Bellamy's eyes. "We need to get her to a hospital, Bellamy," she urged when he didn't move. Bellamy swallowed the rock in his throat and gave a sharp nod before turning back and scooping up his sister. She seemed so small a delicate in his arms. 

    Clarke barely made it all of the way into the truck before Bellamy peeled out of the driveway. Clarke cradled the girl's head in her lap the entire drive to the hospital. What would have normally been a 30 minute drive, only took them 15 minutes. Octavia was whisked away from his arms almost as soon as they crossed the threshold and carted into a different room. Bellamy could hear a nurse asking him questions, but couldn't seem to understand her over the chaos in his skull. A small hand covered his, and he realized that he hadn't been breathing. Clarke squeezed his shaking hand as he drew in an equally unsteady breath.

     "She's going to be okay, Bellamy."  Clarke tried to sound reassuring, but her eyes betrayed her confidence.

     "She's all I have. My sister, my responsibility."  He could tell how wrecked he must have looked by the way Clarke looked at him. "God, if you hadn't been there, Princess..." He let himself trail off, not wanting to think about the alternative. 

    "You can't think like that. We got her out of there, she'll be fine now. That's all that matters." 

    Bellamy used the hand wrapped around his to pull Clarke into him. She leaned into his chest as his arms wrapped around her shoulders. "Thank you, Princess." He whispered into her hair as he held her. 

    It was hours until a doctor came out to let them know how Octavia was holding up. Someone must have slipped something into her drink, but she was going to alright. They were able to get most of the drug out of her system. She should be able to go home in a few hours after they re-hydrated her. For the first time since Clarke had told him that something was wrong, Bellamy was able to breathe freely. 

    "See, I told you she'd be fine." Clarke smiled and nudged Bellamy in the side with her elbow playfully, but Bellamy could see the relief in her face that must have mirrored his own. Relief that quickly reverted back to concern when she saw the rage rising up behind Bellamy's dark eyes.

     "I'm going to kill whoever did this," His voice came out as a low rumble from behind clenched teeth. "I am going to figure out who did this, I will tear that house apart until the dirtbag who-"

     "Bellamy," Clarke cut him off. "I highly doubt that anyone in the house is stupid enough to mess with your sister, they all know who she is and what you are capable of. It wouldn't have been one of them."

     Bellamy growled in frustration as he realized that she was probably right, and that he had no way of tracking down every party crasher who had attended tonight. They didn't exactly have a sign-in sheet set up at the door.  

    "Somebody tried to hurt her, Clarke. People don't just roofie girls for shits and giggles." He lowered his voice to a harsh whisper when he noticed that a majority of the waiting room was now watching them. 

    "This is my fault, I was right beside her the whole night. I should have been paying more attention. I should have seen who did it. I should have been able to stop it." Clarke deflated a little and slumped down the wall they were standing by. Bellamy sat beside her on the cold marbled floor. He founder her hand and laced his fingers through hers, rubbing circles over the back of her hand with his thumb. 

    "There is only one person at fault here, Princess, and it's not you." 

    Clarke leaned her head onto his shoulder, "She's important to me too, you know." 

    "I know, and she knows too." He smiled and gave her hand a squeeze. "We should go in and check on her, she's probably not very happy right now."


	7. Chapter 7

     When a certain Friday rolled around Clarke wanted nothing more than to lock herself in her room for the weekend. This was the weekend that she had been dreading since the very beginning of the school year. This weekend was the sorority's annual Father-Daughter weekend. The other girls in the house had shown sympathy upon hearing Clarke's situation, but insisted that she still attend the events as some form of moral support or some other team building bullshit excuse. Clarke thought that she was going to be sick when she entered the house on Friday night and saw all of the loving fathers cozied up to their doting daughters. 

     Clarke was happy to see the same look of disgruntled disgust on Octavia's face beside her. Octavia was the only other girl in the house who did not have a father to be present for the event, though her circumstances were slightly different than Clarke's. Octavia also had the luxury of having a brother to stand in for her missing father figure for most of the events. 

     It had only been slightly over one year since Clarke's father was killed during a hit and run car accident, so the pain was still fresh enough to wrench Clarke's stomach at the sight of all of the happy families around her. Octavia, on the other hand, had never known her father. Her disdain came from seeing the other girls work their way into daddy's wallet. 

     Clarke managed to get out of the BBQ on Friday night early by claiming that she had a bad headache, which was not too far from the truth. The next day, the house had a softball game lined up with the dads playing against the girls.  It was really just an excuse for the girls to dress in their shortest workout shorts and paint their faces while the Omega boys watched from the sidelines.

     Clarke could feel Bellamy's eyes watching her as everyone filed onto the field. Everyone except Clarke. She was set up to man the refreshment table since she did not have anyone to buddy up with on the field. This was one of the events that Octavia was able to use her brother as a stand in for, so Clarke was alone in her exile.

     However, as she sat next to the field where everyone was taking their places, Bellamy's eyes were glued on her lone form at the sidelines, Clarke wished that they were still avoiding each other. The topic of Clarke's dad had never come up between the pair, but Clarke assumed that he knew from Octavia's inability to ever keep a secret. She wasn't ready for him to see her vulnerable again. Sure, she had gotten her chance to comfort him at the hospital a few weeks ago, and it had been nice to see him crack a little this time instead of her seemingly endless emotional crumbling, but Clarke was ready to stop this hurtfest that they had going on over the past few weeks. 

     Everyone left the field for a short break about an hour into the game. Bellamy's eyes immediately flicked to Clarke every now and again as he sipped his water in the shade. Clarke made a show of pretending not to notice. She was in a shitty enough mood today without him saying something stupid to her. It didn't take long, however, for him to make his way over to where she sat in the grass by herself, trying to avoid the onslaught of giggles coming from the hoard gathering along the sidelines. Clarke tried her best not to look at him as he sat down beside her. 

     "What the matter, Princess? Doesn't daddy love you enough to take time out of his busy schedule to visit you?" His voice was mocking and snide.  Clarke's chest constricted at his words. He didn't know. She pretended not to hear him and continued plucking blades of grass from the dirt. She was suddenly regretting the uneasy alliance that they had formed after their trip to the hospital with Octavia. "You know daddy issues actually explain a lot. Nothing like an inattentive father to really top off the whole 'poor little rich girl' image you have going on."  

     Clarke refused to look at him for fear that she might actually murder him or burst into tears, she didn't know which would be worse, instead she stood up and walked away without a word. Bellamy watched her leave in stunned silence. It wasn't like her to leave without trying to get the last word in. He was about to shrug it off as Clarke just not being in the mood to bicker when he received a swift smack to the back of the head from his younger sister. 

     "What the hell is wrong with you?" Octavia hissed, a look of disbelief on her face, as soon as Clarke was safely out of earshot. 

     "What? It was just a joke? It's not my fault if her dad doesn't love her." Bellamy defended himself, but the look on his sister's face was making him second guess himself. Yeah, he knew it had been a pretty shitty thing to say, but compared to how they normally fought it was actually rather mild.

     "Her dad is dead, you dumb fuck." Octavia spat back at him, and Bellamy couldn't help but curse in response, something close to fear tightening in his stomach.

    "These are the kinds of things that you should probably warn me about, O, so I don't go and make an ass of myself." He jumped up from his place on the grass in one smooth motion and took off after Clarke. She was halfway to the dorms when he finally caught up with her. "Clarke, wait!" He called to her just before falling into place next to her. 

    "Typically, when someone walks away, that means that they don't want to talk to you anymore, Bellamy." Clarke huffed, trying to keep her cool, and kept walking without so much as a sideways glance. 

    "Clarke, come on, I didn't know. I was just teasing. If I had known, you know that I would have never-" 

    "Oh, but wouldn't you?" She stopped walking and turned to face in him a challenge. 

    Bellamy was taken aback for a moment before he spoke, "Of course I wouldn't, you know that. I have never said anything that I thought would actually hurt you." 

    Clarke scoffed, "What about Raven?" Clarke found herself yelling before she could stop herself, water brimmed in her eyelashes and blurred her vision. She mentally cursed herself as she attempted to blink away the traitorous moisture.

     "I didn't think that would hurt you, I didn't think you would even care." His cracked voice seemed impossibly quiet next to hers, desperation clung to every word. 

     "It was right after we kissed, Bellamy. How could you think I wouldn't care?" 

    "Because you said so!" It was his turn to raise his voice incredulously as he stared at Clarke in disbelief. "You told my sister it was a mistake!" He had to use all of his self control to keep from truly yelling. 

    "That is not what I said!" Clarke, however, was not worried about allowing herself to yell with all of her fury. "I said it was my choice if I wanted to make a mistake, I never said that _you_  were a mistake." She frantically swatted a stay tear from her cheek, smudging the black bars that the girls had carefully painted across their faces for the game. "That's what I came to tell you that night."

    "Well, shit, Clarke! I'm not a mind reader!"

     Clarke had no answer to that. She could not deny that she had made it seem as if she had not wanted him, she had even momentarily convinced herself that she hadn't wanted him. As irrational as it was, she was upset with Bellamy for not realizing what she wanted even before she did. Unfortunately, knowing there is a lack of logic behind your feelings rarely makes the pain and easier. Bellamy watched her anger go from a raging boil to a cool simmer as she ran over the argument in her head. 

    "When you said those things to O," he started in a low whisper, "God, that was the worst feeling in the world for me. I never wanted to be your rebound, Clarke. For the first time in my life, I want something more, something real. That very first night, I cut and ran because even after just a few minutes of talking to you I knew you were dangerous to me, so I did what I do best and I bolted. I thought I was going to lose my mind when you cozied up with Prince Charming, but I also knew that I had no one to blame but myself. That's what it has always been about, Clarke." Bellamy stroked her cheeks, his dark eyes staring into hers. "You've always had the power to destroy me, Princess, and as much as I couldn't let that happen, I also couldn't let you go. But I don't want to keep running from you, from this, whatever it is."

    Clarke took a cautious step backward and Bellamy's face fell. "I'm not ready to jump into anything."

    "I can wait. There's no rush." Bellamy nodded, a flicker of hope returning to his eyes. "You make the rules, you set the pace." 

    Clarke took a tentative step toward the boy in front of her."We could start with a kiss."

    Before Clarke could say another word, she found herself being pulling into Bellamy's arms. His lips silencing whatever second thoughts Clarke was having into nothing more than a soft hum. She could feel her tears wet against his cheeks, but they were quickly losing the frustration behind them. In Bellamy's arms, she felt something that she had never felt with Finn. She felt home. His lips moved over hers with a gentle passion that made her heart seem to slow and quicken at the same time. He pulled away with a shaky breath and brought his forehead to rest against hers. 

     Her breath tickled his cheeks and he broke out into a grin, leaning even closer in. "I think I can work with that." His mouth brushed hers with every syllable. 

    Clarke pushed herself up the rest of the way into him, leading his mouth into a slow, languid kiss. She could feel his smile as her fingers caressed the line of his jaw. 

     "Oh, gross!" Octavia's voice yelled to them from across the street. "Get a room!" The pair broke apart to look at the girl crossing the street towards them, a look of smug amusement plastered on her face. "It's about time though. I was starting to get worried that I had ruined your only chance. You guys do have shitty timing though, you left me at the game all by myself! Not cool!" Octavia dodged a playful strike from her brother with a laugh.

     "We have bad timing?" Bellamy's eyebrows disappeared into his mop of hair as he stared incredulously down at his sister. "I think there is some saying about a pot and a kettle that applies perfectly here." 

    "I see you managed to make her cry first though." Octavia said as she examined Clarke. "Not that I would have expected anything different from you, anyways." The dark haired beauty spun on her heel to face her brother again. "I know you're the one usually giving this speech, but don't fuck this up." She jabbed a finger into Bellamy's chest with a glare.

     Bellamy's eyes flew to Clarke's amused face over his sister's head and he smiled. "I really don't know where you get these ideas about me, O." His eyes softened the longer he watched Clarke, and he desperately wished that his sister was not currently standing between the two of them. "There is nothing I have ever wanted more than some sort of guarantee that I won't fuck this up." 

 


	8. The Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it! The grand finale! I'm sorry that it is about a month late, this semester has been kicking my butt between class and work. Anywho, I hope you have all enjoyed the journey. I appreciate everyone who has left kudos and comments, you guys are the best! I've already started working on a second story, but I want to get a little further into it before posting.

    Bellamy awoke to a soft trail of kisses tickling his shoulder blades. One corner of his mouth twitched upward as he opened one eye to look at the girl beside him. Three months. For three months he had had the privilege of waking up to her soft blue gaze and gentle smile.

     "Hey Princess." His fingers found hers on the mattress between them and gave her hand a gentle squeeze, his voice still groggy from sleep.

     He pulled her close into the circle of his arms and slipped his hands underneath the back of her t-shirt. Her lips met his with the same tenderness that his fingers held as they slid across her skin. It still amazed him how soft she felt. She chuckled against his lips before pulling away. This earned a soft groan from Bellamy. 

    "You're going to be late." She whispered as he distracted himself with her throat. 

    "I don't care." His breath brushed across her collarbone making her squirm against him in a way that only egged Bellamy on more. His smile spread across her skin. 

    "Bell," She scolded, "You can't be late for your graduation." Her tone was chastising, but the fire behind her eyes did little to persuade him to stop. 

    He pushed her shirt up to the bottom of her rib cage with a smirk and lowered his mouth to her exposed stomach. 

    "I'll just go to my next one." Her belly bounced under his mouth with her laugh. God, he loved that laugh. "What time is it?" He murmured into her belly button.

    Clarke's eyes darted to the clock beside his bed before returning to his face. "8:30" Her voice came out breathy as he moved lower and lower down her abdomen.

     "Graduation doesn't start until ten. We have plenty of time." He looked up at her through his brow and the tangle of messy curls that had fallen over his forehead.

     His chest tightened as their eyes met. it had taken him some time to learn not to fight the urge to pull away when his heart tugged toward her. All of the feelings that he had spent his entire life running from and denying were suddenly there in the forefront, demanding attention. For the first time in his life, he did not want to run away, and that in itself was terrifying. She brushed his dark hair out of his face with a tenderness that froze Bellamy in his tracks. 

    He laid his head down with his cheek on her belly and his ear resting in the crook of her hip bone as she continued to pet him, his eyes darted back and forth between hers. His pulse calmed with every stroke of her fingers. 

    "I can't stay in the house after I graduate," He broke the silence after a few moments, "I'll need to find an apartment near campus for while I'm completing my Master's." Her fingers stilled in his locks, sensing what was coming. "I'll have to move O in. Lord knows I cannot leave that girl to her own devices." There was a pause as he carefully considered his next words, his lips worked with his nerves. "You should come too." He tried to sound as nonchalant as he could, but the furrow in his brow and the frantic darting of his eyes across her face was unmistakable. 

    Clarke tried to suppress her smile at his agitation. "Bellamy Blake, are you asking me to move in with you?"

     He frowned at her mocking tone and offered a shrug. "Well, I mean, when you put it like that...yeah. I mean, I guess. Whatever." He shifted uncomfortably against her hip as he watched her. With a quick shimmy, she scooted down the bed until she was face to face with him. 

    "Are you sure you're ready for something like that?" She watched his face carefully, looking for any sign of hesitation or doubt, but finding none. 

    "Since the moment I met you, Princess." He stroked her face. "Remember, you had five months to fall in love with someone else, I knew I was gone as soon as I saw you with him." Clarke frowned at the memory. 

    "You should have stopped me." 

    "Would it have made a difference?" He asked. "You're stubborn when it comes to listening to people you like. I was hardly in a position of influence." 

    "I don't know, I've found that you can be pretty persuasive." Her lips moved over his, eliciting a smile out of Bellamy. Bellamy took that as his cue to put his hands back to work sliding up her back underneath her shirt, bringing the thin cotton up with him. 

 

\---------------------------------------------------------------

 

    

     Bellamy had managed to shed his coat before the graduation party at the boy's house after the ceremony. A fact that he was grateful for as he rolled up the sleeves to his dress shirt in a further attempt to deal with the heat of the house. Out of the corner of his eye could see a group of girls eyeing him from across the room. From the frown on Clarke's face, she had seen them as well. Instinctively, Bellamy pulled the girl beside him tighter into his side.

     The first few weeks it had definitely been difficult to convey the message to the rest of the world that he was suddenly and completely off limits. After years of building his reputation, people were finding it hard to believe that he had turned over a new leaf. It was a little hard for him to believe himself, but if he was going to prove to Clarke that he was serious about this, then he knew he could not have any more slip ups. Especially since Clarke seemed pretty skittish about the whole deal at first. He could hardly blame her having trust issues after the year she was having, especially given his track record. He had even managed to forgo sex for the first two months. She was worth the wait. Hell, she was worth the world. 

    She seemed to relax in his arms as he spun her in to face him. He stroked her hair and her face she watched his face. He could see the gears turning behind her eyes. 

    "Hey, look at me." He cupped her chin in his palm and pulled her gaze back to his face. "Move in with me." His voice was a calm whisper amid the raging tumult of her thoughts. 

    Her first reaction to his words was for her eyes to dart to the group of girls who had stopped giggling and were now watching the pair with scorn in their eyes. 

    "It's too soon." Clarke shook his fingers away from her face. 

    She hate the feelings of jealousy that arose in her every time she caught women swooning over Bellamy, which seemed to happen a lot more than she had ever previously realized. Maybe she had always so focused on how he made her feel that she never took the time to see how he made other people feel. She had never been the jealous type in any of her previous relationships. Then again, she had never been cheated on before. Nor had she ever dated anyone with Bellamy's...reputation. When she looked into his eyes she saw a sincerity that called to her heart, begging her to give in. She knew it would be easy, like stepping off of a ledge, only she was blindfolded and had no way of knowing whether or not Bellamy would be there to catch her when she landed. 

    "Move in with me." He urged her, breaking her out of her thoughts. 

    "But what if-" She started, but he cut her off. 

    "But what? Clarke, life is full of 'what ifs'. You can't live your life constantly asking yourself what if. Not moving in could have even worse consequences as moving it. You don't know and that's the point." His earnestness made her smile. "You have the summer to think about it. Just promise me that you'll think about it." 

    "I'll think about it." She conceded, planting a kiss on his lips. She could practically feel the girls' envious eyes burning holes into her side. 

 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

    They stood in the middle of her childhood room, surrounded by the memorabilia of Clarke's adolescence. Adorning the walls where trophies and ribbons to competitions that Clarke could barely remember. Her fingers secured the knot of his tie and smoothed it down the front of his chest. 

    "Hey," He called her attention up to his face with a soft voice, "you shouldn't frown so much." He kissed the small crease between her eyebrows. "I much prefer when you smile, Princess." 

    "I just don't understand how she can get married so fast." Clarke leaned into Bellamy with a sigh. He stroked the soft skin between her shoulder blades and the tension eased out of her muscles. "Dad's only been gone for two years. It's too soon." 

    "Now where have I heard that before?" He smirked down at her with a bit of smug pride. "Me? I don't believe in too soon or too late. When you're ready, you're ready. There is no use waiting just to make other people feel better. You're mom's got to do what makes her happy." He stroked a blonde curl away from her face with the tips of his fingers before dropping his hands to run them down the sides of the pale purple chiffon of her bridesmaid's dress. "It wasn't too soon for us, it won't be too soon for her. Have some faith." With a nod, Clarke took Bellamy's hand into her own and led him toward the door. 

    Later that evening, at the reception, Bellamy held Clarke in his arms as they swayed together on the dance floor at the edge of the crowd. Above them the dim lights swiveled to the beat of the music, casting swirling shadows around the room in slow, lazy motions. Clarke sighed as she watched her mother melt into the arms of Kane. Clarke saw a happiness in her mother's eyes that she had not seen in a long time. What had she been so worried about? Bellamy was right, her mother deserved this. Bellamy watched her watch the newly weds thoughtfully. The love on both of their faces was clear as day. 

    "Maybe that will be us one day." The words slipped from his lips before he was able to think better of them. Clarke's head snapped back to look up into his soft brown eyes. 

    "What?" The confused look on her face had nothing to do with not having heard him, much to Bellamy's chagrin. He couldn't remember the last time his ears had felt so hot, and he was suddenly very thankful for the low lighting in the room. Clarke couldn't help but laugh at the mortified look on his face as he frantically thought of something to say to get him out of the position he just put him in.

     "Emphasis on someday-meaning in the future-far, far in the future." A small smile graced Bellamy's lips and visibly relaxed the more he thought about it, a smile grew on his face. "Maybe in 10 or 15 years, if you're lucky." He joked as he lowered his face to her, a chuckle brushing her lips. "Someday," he pulled back to study the blonde beauty in his arms, "and don't even think about giving me any of that 'too soon' nonsense you seem so fond of." She smiled playfully up at him.

    "Someday." Clarke repeated just before melting into Bellamy's arms. 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading my first chapter! Let me know what you think. Things are about to get crazy in the upcoming chapters ;)


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